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TOPIC: Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance

Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69242

Hi All,

Hoping I can get some help on this form.

My Situation:
Recently split up with my girlfriend with whom I have one child (22 months old)

When the relationship started to go south she would tell me that by law I have to pay her £1800 PCM
£668 in child maintenance & £1132 in Housing Benefit
Because I hand her over £1800 per month I cannot afford to have a decent place of my own (I live and work in London)

Whenever I bring up the sacrifice I am making during a heated discussion her response is " I get what the government says I can have" and "you are legally obliged to pay this money so you cannot bring it up"

her claim regarding housing benefit is that if she claims housing benefit because I work full time HMRC would deduct the money she gets from my wages.

Is that a true statement?

I will do anything for my son, he is the most important person in my life, however paying £1800 to his mother does not allow me to save, or do much else besides live a very modest life.

I have moved in with my parents and secretly hoping that my X will start working full time when my son is older so my monthly payments can reduce and I can start to rebuild my life.

any advice would be very helpful,

Cheers

Ad

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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69245

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Hi and welcome to the forum

The information your ex has given you isn't exactly true I'm afraid.

By law, the minimum you should have to pay in maintenance can be calculated here -

www.cmoptions.org/en/calculator/

This is maintenance towards the cost of raising your child. Many families have a private family based arrangement and it is up to you if you want to pay above the minimum. Whatever you pay, do it via bank transfer or standing order so that you have a record if she ever tried to bring a case against you for non payment.

You have no obligation to pay her rent. She can claim Housing & Council Tax Benefit by applying through her local council's office. She can claim Child Tax Credits via HMRC and possibly Income Support via the Benefits office. These are all separate agencies.

What you earn has no bearing on the amount of Housing Benefit she can claim unless you are living together. Nobody can deduct anything from your wages because she is claiming Housing Benefit and HMRC are nothing to do with Housing Benefit. The only contact the 2 agencies have is to confirm a claimants income.

I'm sorry you have been so misinformed on these issues.

Please feel free to ask any further questions and we will try to help.
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I have several years experience supporting parents in family proceedings as a McKenzie Friend. I am, however, not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.

Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69268

Hello Adlondon1984

Child maintenance is a contribution towards the cost of bringing up a child and this includes not only such items as food and clothing but also it is a contribution towards the home that the child lives in and the associated costs of running that home.

Child maintenance is calculated on the paying parent’s gross income, which is income before Income Tax and National Insurance are taken off, but after occupational or personal pension scheme contributions are taken away. The link that Yoda has provided on his post you may find useful, as it can give you an indication on how much maintenance may be payable.

I have also included a link on how the Child Maintenance Service calculate child maintenance that you may find helpful, www.gov.uk/how-child-maintenance-is-work...ut-child-maintenance .

As Yoda has mentioned your income does not affect any income related benefits your ex-partner may receive. However, with her receiving child maintenance she would need to inform the Jobcentre Plus (JCP) of this.

There are various ways that child maintenance can be arranged, for more information on all the different ways to set up child maintenance and for a more personalised service, you can visit the Child Maintenance Options website at www.cmoptions.org .

The DWP have a sorting out separation web-app that you may find useful. It offers help and support to separating and separated families. The link is: www.dad.info/divorce-and-separation/sorting-out-separation .

Regards

William
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This information which Child Maintenance Options has provided is not a substitute for independent professional advice and users should obtain professional advice relevant to their particular circumstances.

Please note: the Child Maintenance Options team cannot answer any questions relating to a specific CSA or Child Maintenance Service case

Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69271

Just goes to show, never believe anything an ex has to say

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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69373

Hey,

Also a little pointer in addition to the replies above--Please Please Please make sure any monies are transferred via bank transfer that state the money as child maintenance-- otherwise the money you have so far transferred will not be accounted when child maintenance do get involved, this being said they will calculate the amount for the year from the date in which a claim is set up- so if you set it up now it will be the amount to pay for the next year until the end of october next year. from past experience of many people i know i would defo go official. Also, please check the link that you have been given and make sure the calculation child maintenance comes up with looks right- as quite often if an ex makes a claim they will state that you earn more than you do and that you have the children less nights than you do--both of which may impact on the monthly amount..good luck...

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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69611

Hi,

This is a very good point,
Currently I pay £1,800 to the landlord direct, the house is in my name but I do not live there, its just my Son and his mother.

If I am to read your message correctly, I should inform the landlord that my X will be paying the rent from no on, and I transfer that amount to her?

it gets complex as she conned me - pretty much sore that that was my legal obligation, i confronted her about this deceit to which she said "the situation did not happen as you are saying it did"

If I am paying the rent whole amount of the rent, could my X claim that i am not supporting my child in doing so, just for transparency sake, she decided that this is where she wanted my "maintenance to go"

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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69614

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adlondon1984 wrote: Hi,

This is a very good point,
Currently I pay £1,800 to the landlord direct, the house is in my name but I do not live there, its just my Son and his mother.

You are leaving yourself wide open here, she could easily claim that you have not been paying her child maintenance and you couldn't prove otherwise.

If I am to read your message correctly, I should inform the landlord that my X will be paying the rent from no on, and I transfer that amount to her?

You need to take yourself off the tenancy agreement altogether in my opinion, whilst your name is on there it would create problems for her in claiming housing and other benefits.

it gets complex as she conned me - pretty much sore that that was my legal obligation, i confronted her about this deceit to which she said "the situation did not happen as you are saying it did"

If I were you I would do the calculation using the CSA calculator and set up a bank transfer/ standing order and pay the calculated amount into her account, referencing it as child maintenance. Or alternatively opening a case with CSA directly and asking them to work out your payments for you and then pay this amount into her account, again making sure the payments are referenced as child maintenance

If I am paying the rent whole amount of the rent, could my X claim that i am not supporting my child in doing so, just for transparency sake, she decided that this is where she wanted my "maintenance to go"


Yes she could! Once the right amount has been calculated and you start paying, you are not required to make any further contributions. It is her responsibility to pay her own bills and other expenses, she can claim for child benefit and tax credits, help with housing and council tax and income support if she doesn't work

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.
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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69615

I am almost in tiers that its come to this, I just want what is best for my boy,
Thanks so much for this reply, I will action these points.

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Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69616

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I've noted your other post...I'm so sorry that you are in this situation...unfortunately it happens far too often, to far too many good and loving dads.

I need to make you aware that once you do start to bring your payments in line with what you should be paying she may well use contact with your son as a weapon to illicit more money from you...again this is more common than you would think.

Generally when it reaches this stage then the only option you will have is mediation, and failing that, court for an order for contact.

Your little boy is still quite young so hopefully you can get this sorted out without it having too much of an effect on him.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.

Other Costs aside from Child Maintenance 3 years 9 months ago #69621

Hi There,
.
I have replied on your other post as well.
.
For me the most important things for you to do before anything else is to get yourself off the rental agreement ad start paying her directly through bank transfer, if you can't transfer the money then get a reciept book and ensure before you have handed over the money she signs to say she has recieved it, you can pick up, duplicate reciept books in sainsbury's cheaply.
.
As said if you pay the landlord, you aren't paying her and you could end up having claims made against you for non payment.
.
GTTS
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