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TOPIC: Contact with Child

Contact with Child 4 months 2 days ago #96839

  • pmh1985
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I'm new here, so this is a first post for me, i'm just after some advice with regards to the CMS process and if i'm going to get to be able to put my case across.

So my ex and i have always had a private agreement between us and it has worked fairly well at times, but sometimes there have been disagreements.

She now has a new partner and a new baby and has decided that she wants to go through the CMS, she has also said that she wants to cut the amount of time that i see my daughter to one weekend a month from two weekends. i'm fine with the idea of going through the CMS if she wants, but ideally would like to sort it out and carry on with our private agreement. My problem, however, is that i do not want to see my daughter any less than i do now, and, if anything would like to increase the time that i have with her, will the application process just side completely with my ex? or will i be able to put my side to them?

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Contact with Child 4 months 2 days ago #96840

  • Ldad
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If you were to go through the court system, you would have to attempt mediation first.

However through my partner's experience, they have never taken into account the CMS side of things. He has always paid and even when the mother tried to say he didnt to reflect badly on him etc they were not interested in CMS in the slightest and told the mother raise any issues directly with CMS. They have only ever been interested in the contact arrangement and have treated them completely separate.

I do not see why the court would reduce you're time with your child (given there are no safeguarding issues). On a very general basis the standard contact would be every other weekend and midweek contact if practically possible, and increased time during school holidays. But obviously everyone's cases are different so there is nothing to say you couldn't get more if you tried.

CMS would expect you to pay regardless of the contact you have with your child, payments should be made even if contact is refused as i said they are not linked.

Good luck

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Contact with Child 4 months 2 days ago #96845

Hi There,

As already said above contact and child maintenance are not linked,

if there is no court ordered contact in place then you would need to go through mediation and then court to get one, other wise it is difficult to challenge your ex on the contact side of things.

Having a case through CMS can sometimes be easier as there can be no arguments over what you will pay.


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Contact with Child 4 months 2 days ago #96854

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What reason has she given to reduce contact? Is your daughter old enough to have an opinion on her time with you?

Courts want both parents to be involved in their child’s life, as long as there are no safeguarding issues. It would be unlikely that they would reduce time spent with your child, so I doubt that would happen.

If she unilaterally reduces contact, I wouldn’t waste any time in getting it sorted out, before the new reduced schedule becomes the precedent.

Mediation can assist you in helping the mother to realise that contact isn’t something that she can change at will... your daughter has a right to see you and changes in her mothers life shouldn’t impact negatively on her.

We have had many Dads that have gone through the court process successfully, it can be very expensive if solicitors are involved, but is doable without legal representation, particularly with straightforward cases such as yours.

All the best

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DadTalk Moderator...

I'm not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.

I may not be legally trained... but I have plenty of experience and common sense!

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