I’m trying to co parent with my ex for my daughter but it seem to getting extremely difficult. She want to talk to her in person where she doesn’t sit in the room with me when I visit my daughter. It seem
Communication she wants but every time I asked about my daughter she just relied with she’s fine. She also want me to tell her she doing a good job with raising our daughter. Not sure how to proceed with co parenting with her.
I tell my ex she does a great job at raising our child all the time, which is mostly true, except for when she tries to convince me our child doesn't want to see me which is bollocks.
Even if she wasn't a great mom, I'd still tell her she is, because it helps keep her calm and gives me back some level of control, as she is more likely to listen to me when I'm nice to her. Also, considering that I chose her to be our childs mom, what would it say about me if she wasn't such a great mom after all ?
Once in a while the ex will say or do something silly,like in your case wanting to talk in person where she doesn't sit in the room with you. When that happens, what I find helpful is to smile to the ex, and at the first opportunity talk to someone else, go for a walk, take deep breaths, and then come back to the ex and smile again.
It reminds me of this scene in the movie Madagascar, smile and wave:
Regarding on how to proceed, I think the key is build up. Start small, and try to build up small improvements over time. It won't happen overnight, and parenting is always difficult, even if you weren't separated.