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TOPIC: seperation then divorce

seperation then divorce 8 months 1 day ago #95055

NEW ON HERE HOPE THIS IS THE RIGHT PLACE TO POST THIS !!!...SORRY IF NOT ALSO PUT IT ON UR FACEBOOK PAGE

WONDERING IF ANYONE ELSE HAS A SIMILAR PROBLEM AS MINE

Hello my name is paul i am 50 next year i hope you can really help me i will try and keep this as brief as possible

i met my partner now wife back in 1995 ..we had a son in 1998 at the time we both worked fast forward to 2003 and we find that our son is autistic / special needs ..we have a discussion and decide it would be for the best if i gave my job up to become my sons full time carer i get carers allowance for looking after him so i became his carer and also a househusband ...stay at home dad / cook etc as i was better at this stuff
2003 we had a baby daughter
2005 we got married
now in 2018 my wife has turned round and said she no longer has any feelings for me or loves me etc....and wants to seperate ..she has had these feelings for about 3 years and kept them hidden from me and only now after our house has been completely decorated ie done up has she hit me with this...i did most of the work on the house myself as i used to be in the building game i feel used !!! am gutted still have feelings for her
the house is now up for sale at offers over £200k and we owe about £98k on it

i have no savings as i am reliant on the wife to pay the bills..she earns about £28k a year she has said none of this is my fault and it is her who is walking away from the marriage
So what i need to know where do i go from here and would she have to pay me spousal maintainence etc as i have been reliant on her for all these years
WIFE CAN GET ANOTHER MORTGAGE I CANNOT AS I HAVE NO JOB BECAUSE OF MY SON
wife thinks the house should be split 50/50 equity i think more like 60/40 in my favour as i gave my job up thus not bringing in a wage for 15 years ..so i am dependant mostly apart from carers allowance on the wife for money

my now 20 year old autistic/special needs son will be comming with me
my 14 year old daughter will be going with her mother once we sell the house she wants no csa for her

Btw the marriage has failed due to a interfering mother in law poisoning my wifes !!! mind no affairs and no bad stuff apart from mother in law !!! ..! where do i stand legally about money and rights etc as even now my 20 year old son still needs my support.....so sorry its not as short as you would probably like ..but do not no where to turn for legal advice as i have no money ...thankyou .i am now on anti deppressants 1st time ever
ANY SOLICITORS ON HERE FOR ADVICE THANKS

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Last Edit: by spikey10.

seperation then divorce 8 months 1 day ago #95060

Hi There,

I would say that if you were to fight that you may manage to gain 60% of the equity, but that would be a risk, and you would probably have to fight to get that and then that would cost you money you don't have, so you would be gambling with the money that you may get if you won the 60% through court.

You may find that it could cost you the same as the 10% more that you are looking to get to get the extra 10% meaning that it would be pointless, or you could end up spending, and getting less then the 10% you are looking for meaning it has actually leaves you with less than you would get if you took the 50% she is suggesting.

I would as someone looking in from the outside say that accepting the 50% split is not only a safe option, but it will reduce the stress that you will go through, which if you are already on anti depressants you could do without.

GTTS
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seperation then divorce 8 months 1 day ago #95062

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I agree with the above. Worth going in for 60% so that it looks like you are being reasonable by shifting your position when you go to 50%
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