Hi...wondering if anyone has advice on Life Insurance.
I broke up with the mother of my children in 2011. We got divorced and settled everything a long time ago.
She has now produced a joint life insurance document with AVIVA with both our names on.
She has asked me to transfer it to her - but my name will still appear on it.
I am uncomfortable with this. She has been making the payments on it since 2013 when we moved out of the marital home. But I am still not comfortable with the notion she has the benefit of receiving monies if I died but it would not work the other way, if she dies it goes to her estate.
Am I being unreasonable to refuse to sign?
If she did pass away I would need to know I could provide for both my children full time.
In a way, does it actually matter, it's not costing you anything and she's basically gambling (which is effectively what any insurance policy is). You could ask that if you sign it, then the money should go into trust for your children in the event of either death, but I'm not sure if she could change it later on. Alternatively, you refuse to sign and suggest that you both get separate policies on your own lives for the children.
She is saying she cant get a new policy due to her health complications (of which she has told me very little).
I agree with you - why does it matter? - in the end whoever dies first is responsible for the children's welfare and should be trusted accordingly to use life insurance monies to tat effect. if she cant get another policy that isnt my fault.
I would be happy to say in some kind of simple legal document that if she dies - the money should go into a trust for my two children and her third (which she had by new partner) 33% each, released to them on their 18th birthdays or staggered - 18 and 21 - in case they blow it all!
I think her main worry is her third daughter - which I understand.
My ex is using my refusal to sign as proof of me being difficult. She has told my two daughters (12 and 14) that I am refusing to sign causing her stress and anxiety before an operation (of which I also know very little). This is part of a wider pattern of Parental Alienation.