TOPIC: Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind

Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60763

No you do not have to inform your employers.
Will have no effect on your Credit Rating.

No... stop worrying so much lad.

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Last Edit: by jastix.

Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60764

  • BMurkin
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Lol

We argued but she gave as good as she got.

She has a noose around my neck. A cousin who I haven't told about this could send her a random text inviting her to dinner and she could in theory get me arrested for that. It's hard not to be terrified at the things she could do.

I'm just like that. I like discussing every scenario so I know. Believe it or not it gives me peace. I hate uncertainty

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60775

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... The order only names you so it only applies to you. I suggest you advise any members of your family that are likely to contact her unknowingly though, as she may think you are getting to her through them and that may be covered in the order.

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

Last Edit: by Mojo.

Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60791

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Ok will take a break from here. Thanks for all your help guys and your patience.

My mind is in pieces.

Wife is portraying me as a maniac and has even gone to the trouble of including damning (although untrue) photographic evidence of bruises BUT still wants me to have contact and relationship with our son.

She doesn't realise things aren't that simple. You can't tell authorities that someone is dangerous with one hand and then say, with the other, I want my son to have unsupervised contact with them. Do you get what I mean?

She's either incredibly stupid or she telling a pack of lies about wanting me to have contact to make herself look good, knowing very well the courts will do the dirty work for her and keep me away from him. Ready made excuse to tell our son.

I may have been a crap husband. Not violent but crap. I made mistakes but I was never a bad father. She's gonna mess our son up.

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60793

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I think we all understand how distressed you must be feeling BM... We are all here to help you and we know that the very best advice we can give you is to step back right now...not from the forum, just from the what ifs and worrying about everything... but that doesn't mean we don't want to give you the support you need....hang on in there.

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

Last Edit: by Mojo.

Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60795

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You guys have been great.

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60855

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So I've registered for the Parenting Puzzle course at my local child centre. It starts after Easter though.

I'm doing it because I want to learn how to manage disagreements better in future without resorting to shouting and arguing - between myself and my wife since despite splitting we'll be in touch indirectly over son and of course, for my son since I'm sure we'll have disagreements in future.

I hope CAFCAAS or my wife's solicitors don't twist this as some kind of admission that I'm currently a bad parent.

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60858

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I think they will see it more as wanting to do things better in future, but no as an admission of guilt. It shows that you want to move forward and are placing your child's well being at the centre of that. It's a child focused approach that the various agencies always approve of IMO.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.
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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 9 months ago #60866

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I think I've made a real tit of myself contacting my wife's solicitors directly

- I've sent them numerous e-mails trying to negotiate contact. They did state in their e-mail to me that I should negotiate contact through them and vontact them to discuss it.


- my wife offered daily phone calls via her solicitors, where she'll call and hand the phone over to son. This was going well until my wife accused me via her solicitors of telling our son to to tell her to ignore the solicitors and come home. I said no such thing, my son asked where are you and I said "you'll be home soon". I guess this is wrong as well but it was the first week of the injunction. Now I can't have this. Just the weekly unsupervised contact at the centre.

I'm terrified that they'll bring the latter up at my non molesatation hearing next week and get me prosecuted since I guess it's a breach of the injunction.

I'm a major screw up. This period of my life has taught me that im more dangerous to myself than anyone else.

I just can't take this.

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 8 months ago #61751

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So the judge received my wifes child arrangement order application on the 18th Feb but still not heard anything. Phoned up the court but all that they could tell me is that its still with the judge.

Wife soliciter still hasn't clarified nature of application but as mentioned before I'm guessing it's a residence order.

Nothing much to do other than sit and wait. even the lady who answered the phone said she was surprised it's still with judge but couldn't give me further info. I wonder if it's the fact my wife has applied that is causing the delay, the judge is confused.

Meeting the mediators this week so I can get my c100 signed off and send it. Solicitor advised me to first do it but now thinks it's pointless since my wife has done the same thing. Confusing.

Started my parental puzzle sessions. First session was interesting but all the other parents who attended were happily still married, so their marital stories made me depressed. Still the course is quite useful.

I tried applied to Seperated parents program but was told I can only join if referred to by a judge.

Any other courses that anyone can recommend?

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 8 months ago #61777

HI MAN

Do you live in London? I am going through a similar situation. I am a bit ahead of you. So if you would like to meet up for a coffee please let me know and we can plan it. I would also like to suggest a FNF group nearest to you. You need support.

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Desperate need for help and advise, losing my mind 4 years 8 months ago #61779

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No I'm not in London any more but thanks for kind offer

I contacted two local FNF meetings but heard nothing back. I'm tempted to just turn up but I guess you need to register first

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