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TOPIC: I need Advice

I need Advice 4 years 2 months ago #66727

  • Mojo
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....I think it's time to relax a little now and recharge your batteries, it must have been an intense and distressing time for you, and as you say a part of you was hoping for everything to go back to how it was.

Take your time and be kind to yourself, concentrate on your children and take time out for yourself too.

Alcoholism takes a terrible toll on families, as I know from experience.... At some point those involved have to take a step back from the person that is destroying themselves and put themselves first. It's terrible that your daughter was caught up in this in such a way, but I'm sure that your other children have been affected too. Making life as normal as you can and securing their home life is as much as you can do....you have done that, they are safe and secure and it's down to you.

Children are so resilient and I'm sure that with your support and love life can move forward for you all. Good luck.

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

I need Advice 4 years 2 months ago #66730

  • Wighto
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Hi

Thanks - everything you say is true............

Its quite bizarre that the worse a person treats you the harder it is to accept the breakdown of the relationship

The kids are doing great - the twins are oblivious to what has gone on - all they know is that they work up one day to find their mum had gone

The older children have suffered as it is the 2nd time they have gone through this and I think it will take them time for sure to get over this

Cheers

Neil

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I need Advice 4 years 2 months ago #66733

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...the fact that the kids are doing great is in most part down to you making the right decisions for their sake.

As far as your relationship with the mother, you have invested so much in making it work and have overcome huge obstacles the first time...you survived that and remained together.....that takes grit and determination and wouldn't have been possible without a great deal of feeling for her. You did your best, more than most, but unfortunately she has her own journey to travel now, it's one of self destruction and although she shouldn't be blamed for it, she had choices...she made the wrong ones. Having invested so much, of course you will find it harder to let go, but you mustn't blame yourself. You will be grieving for what is lost and it will take time for you to work through it.

All the best.

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

I need Advice 4 years 2 months ago #66734

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Just a thought....Here's a link to a helpline that might be helpful for your older children

www.nacoa.org.uk/

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

I need Advice 4 years 2 months ago #66738

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many thanks ill look into this

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