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TOPIC: 6 year old daughter , she's stopped me seeing her

6 year old daughter , she's stopped me seeing her 3 years 11 months ago #69539

Hi looking for some advice , I was asked to have my daughter weds to Friday at short notice by my daughter mother, so I managed to get the time off work and to allow this, the arangement of the last year was I picked her up and she dropped her off normally have her every other weekend , as the week was drawing to wedesday she rang me up and said that is was a long way to travel it being mid week and could I meet her half way, to which I agreed wed come round and I spoke to her on the phone and told her my dad was in the area and could pick her up around 5 to which she said that she had gymnastic and could I pick her up after that around 7, to which I said that a bit late but let me see if I can sort something , to which she said if you leave at 5 and come to
Mine she will be ready, I said so
It goes from me doing the round trip with an hours notice to you not, that don't seem fair, from that she kicked off and said your not seeing her now , later that evening I tried to speak to her and she was very manic on the phone and not making sense i spoke to her mother and who told me that she was tired that y she didn't want to travel she had been off work all week where I had been working 21 days stright, I said I just want to
Draw a line as there no reasoning with her and have my daughter she made all the demand and insisted I apologies to her which i refused and I was and am still very unclear to what I had done wrong , she said/shouted you have to bring her back at 12 on sat as I was despite to see my daughter I agreed so at 7 I left for the 3. Hour round trip to get her, we had a lovely couple of days and speaking to various family memebers they agreed with me and said it was not right and to not let her push and around and to stick to
What was agreed so I messaged her on the sat morning saying that I won't be bring her back as its not fair for me to do
So and told her she is u reasonable and that I'll meet you half way , to which she was calling me names and using emotional blackmail, I met her half way and she said in front of my daughter this is the last time you be seeing her for a while , I said excuse me and she said until you take me to court to which I replied you will need to take me as I am not the one with the problem. I am
Just seeking some advice as not seeing my daughter for months will break me as I'm sure a lot of you, we previously went to court and it was agreed I had alternative weekend ?

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6 year old daughter , she's stopped me seeing her 3 years 11 months ago #69542

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I'm not clear from what you said whether there is a contact order (or child arrangement order if more recent) - can you clarify if this is the case, and when the order was made?

It would also be useful to know roughly what the terms are.

If there is an order, then you may be looking at enforcing the order if it has been breached, or going for an order if it doesn't yet exist (it will be you taking her to court simply because she is the parent with care and you'll be applying for or enforcing contact. However, you'll need to try mediation first, so it's worth checking this out at www.nfm.org.uk

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6 year old daughter , she's stopped me seeing her 3 years 11 months ago #69548

Went to mediation she didn't turn up, I have had it agreed in the courts that I have her every other weekend , ? X

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6 year old daughter , she's stopped me seeing her 3 years 11 months ago #69551

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Hi there

As you have a court order for contact to take place every other weekend then she must abide by this, unless she has a good reason not to. Bickering between parents about who travels where doesn't constitute a good enough reason, unless it is specified in the order who picks up and who drops off, whether it's at a halfway point etc.

From what you have said, the argument arose around a contact visit outside of what has been stated in the order. If so then there hasn't been a breach as such. If I were you I would write to the mother and remind her that there is a court order in place and that you expect her to make your daughter available as usual at the allotted time and place and if she refuses then you will have to go back to court to enforce the order,which is something you really don't want to do and would much prefer if you can sort it out between yourselves....no point getting her back up further. Ask for her agreement and state that if you don't hear from her you will take it to mean that she is stopping contact and will have to take the next step.

It wouldn't hurt to be conciliatory, perhaps say that you regret what happened and in the best interests of your child things need to get back on track....not quite an apology but making the right noises,sometimes it's better to take the path of least resistance to achieve the goal!

To enforce an order you would need to submit form C79 and you wouldnt need to attend mediation first. If you wanted to you could have a solicitor write to her about what would happen if she breaches the order before taking court action.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.
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