• Page:
  • 1
  • 2

TOPIC: Begging for your help

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78095

  • Amirb
  • Amirb's Avatar Topic Author
  • Offline
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 8
  • Thank you received: 0
I have lost my one and only child today. I was forced to give up my application for child arrangement order after years of fighting to see my 9yr old daughter. The judge at the family court, along with the social services were always siding with the mother. Today I was accused by the judge of being a liar without any evidence and she chose to ignore all the evidence against the mother and praised her for the courage she shown. Because of that I gave up any hope that I had and withdrew my application for child arrangement, but now I am all distress, I feel like I am drowning in the middle of the ocean. I miss by beloved daughter whom I haven't seen for almost two years. Will I be able to make a new application for child arrangement tomorrow? How can I take this to the higher court? Please I am begging for anyone to help me.

Thanks

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78099

Keep checking back I'm sure some of the senior members will be able to give you some advice.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78101

I'm confused, you withdrew your application but you didn't mean too? How exactly did you withdraw the application? Did you just say you wanted withdraw it to the judge? did you put it in writing?

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

I'm no way trained in Family court matters so don't take my ramblings as gospel but I've been through the Court mill and learned so much along the way I just like passing my experience on to other Dads who face this absolute nightmare from hell, you might not be able to beat the system but don't let it beat you :)

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78105

  • Amirb
  • Amirb's Avatar Topic Author
  • Offline
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 8
  • Thank you received: 0
HI,
yeah I withdrew it in written and now I am regretting it.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78106

I'm not sure what you can do now maybe someone else could give you some more advice but I know they don't take kindly to people withdrawing applications but I'm sure they will realise it was done in the heat of the moment if you do re apply it's the same ball ache, try mediation, fill out another c100 wait 6 weeks for a directions hearing ect

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

I'm no way trained in Family court matters so don't take my ramblings as gospel but I've been through the Court mill and learned so much along the way I just like passing my experience on to other Dads who face this absolute nightmare from hell, you might not be able to beat the system but don't let it beat you :)

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78114

  • Yoji
  • Yoji's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Expert Boarder
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 512
  • Thank you received: 166
Hi amir,

I did this myself rashly and out of anger last year. Your decision is in the hands of the judge.

Email in to the Court asking for the matter to be allowed to continue and that your withdrawal be rescinded. You may need to put something in that the reason why you did so was due to the case going against you and you felt you were being ignored/evidence disregarded.

Good luck
The following user(s) said Thank You: Amirb

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

~E=mc2~

Begging for your help 3 years 4 months ago #78123

  • Amirb
  • Amirb's Avatar Topic Author
  • Offline
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 8
  • Thank you received: 0
I spoke to some legal expert on the phone and he gave me exactly the same advice as you. I already sent an email to the court for the judges attention explaining my reason and apologising to her. hopefully she will have some sympathy for me, but I doubt it. anyway thanks for your reply.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 3 months ago #78179

  • Amirb
  • Amirb's Avatar Topic Author
  • Offline
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 8
  • Thank you received: 0
The judge restored my application and waiting for a new direction hearing... I am so happy :)

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 3 months ago #78180

  • Yoda
  • Yoda's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Moderator
  • Moderator
  • Posts: 2641
  • Thank you received: 443
excellent news and brilliant advice from Yoji!

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

DAD.info Moderator

I have several years experience supporting parents in family proceedings as a McKenzie Friend. I am, however, not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.

Begging for your help 3 years 3 months ago #78193

RESULT!!! Stick with it now, It felt like an uphill battle for 90% of my case it totally seemed like I was flogging a dead horse and my ex always had the upper hand and the courts believed everything she came out with, you just got to stick in there.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Amirb

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

I'm no way trained in Family court matters so don't take my ramblings as gospel but I've been through the Court mill and learned so much along the way I just like passing my experience on to other Dads who face this absolute nightmare from hell, you might not be able to beat the system but don't let it beat you :)

Begging for your help 3 years 3 months ago #78204

  • Amirb
  • Amirb's Avatar Topic Author
  • Offline
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 8
  • Thank you received: 0
In my case I was 90% sure that the it will go in my favour, because there was tons of evidence against the mother. I don't think it was entirely the judges fault as I believe most of my evidence against her was not presented to the court properly and also she had a good representative. Despite that I was upbeat about it as the judge was very critical of the mother during her evidence. There was also evidence against the mother from the high court where the judge branded her as a “liar” So I was shocked when all the findings I sort from this judge went against me and one of the crucial evidence against the mother regarding my contacts with my daughter was ignored in her findings. And when I was told that there will be no contact arrangement with my daughter and that I have to wait another three months until further court hearing, which point I gave up and withdrew my applications.

The reason I was denied even a supervised contact with my daughter was on the ground that I was telling my daughter that her mother was a “paedophile”, which I never did, but even if I did, surely a supervised contact would be appropriate. I know paedophiles and child murders are allowed to have supervised contacts with their children, but I am being denied. I know the real reason is to cover up the abuse of my daughter which I blamed it on the local authority and now they side with the mother in order to deny me contact with my daughter.

My daughter was removed from her home in April 2015 by her mother and for three months after her removal, I had many contacts with my daughter until 3rd of July 2015. This was when the mother was contacted by the police regarding my complaint of online abuse against her. That night I received a text from my daughters phone saying “I don't want to see you or talk to you for what you do to mommy”. AND THAT IS THE REAL REASON WHICH THEY IGNORE.

In September 2015 My daughter told a independent social worker that she would like to have contact with me, but later changed her mind because her mother told her not to. This social worker along with a psychologist from the local authority visited me several occasions and told me that they do not have any concerns regarding my contact and that they were aware of the mothers influence on my daughter. Soon after this social worker wrote a statement which was very critical of the mother, she was chased away and all her finding was ignored.

When I started by court proceeding in April 2015, I asked for the enforcement of a previous court order and have my daughter returned home, but it never happened, then I asked for shared residency, then I asked for unsupervised contacts, then I asked for supervised contact and now I am just asking for a hope of seeing my daughter someday. I am not going to stop fighting and will seek advice regarding challenging the judges decision regarding my contact.

Below are the list of questions I asked the Southwark Social Services which they never respond to.

In October 2014 I want to the local authority asking for help regarding the abuse of my daughter, but I was turned away by a social worker named xxxxxxx. Is this normal procedure?

In August 2015 Social Services manager xxxxxx stated that there was no concerns regarding contact with me and my daughter and that there was no need for supervision.

In September 2015 my daughter told the social worker xxxxxx that she wants to see me, but changed her mind because her mother told her not to. Why didn't the local authority take any action on this abuse?

October 2015 I had several visit by social worker xxxxx and a psychologist named xxxxxx, they both assured me that they do not hold any concerns regarding contact with my daughter and that they were aware of the mothers influence on her. In the court I found out this social worker left without doing her report. Why did this happen?

November 2015 I was told in the court that the local authority placed my daughter and her mother in a refuge due to domestic violence. I have written to the social services countless time asking to confirm me that the circumstances of their being place in a refuge, but never got any response. Why?

December 2015 social worker xxxxx told me I have to accept supervised contact, because my daughter saying she doesn't want to see me. I did not agree, and she put this against me in her statement, but later I accepted it in the court, but still I had no contact with my daughter. Why?

April 2016 I was told by the manager xxxxxx that my daughter changed her position and that she would like supervised contacts. She told me to give her couple of weeks to arrange a room and told me to bring colouring pen for my daughters activities, but this never took place. Why?

In May 2016 I was told by the manager xxxxxx that I need to take psychological assessment and if I am found not to have psychological issues the authority's will have stronger case in the court for my unsupervised contacts. Why didn't this happen after I was found not to have psychological issues?

July 2016 The court order stated that the authority need to provide me with notes from my daughters child in need meeting which was never provided. Why? You were able to provide this information to xxxxxx son's paternal family in America during the care proceeding in 2008.

September 2016 I was told by the social worker xxxxx that my daughter talked positive of me, she stated she loves me and that she remember I use to do lot of things for her when she was living with me. She assured me this will be in her report for the court. Would the social services admit this facts exist? If not, I can provide evidence of that.

My mistake was not seeking information from group like DADinfo, because the advice here are more valuable than dodgy legal aid solicitors.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Begging for your help 3 years 3 months ago #78342

I really really do feel for you. Reading your last post is very upsetting. Seems like social services have totally let you down time and time again.

I can't offer any legal advice but when the SW in my case was not challenging the mother at all and taking her word for gospel my solicitor said there is an alternative which previous clients of his have found useful in court proceedings.

It may not be of benefit in the short term but once contact is resumed perhaps you could use them,

Basically, in a nutshell, they are an agency that facilitate hand overs, come to observe and do reports etc. Much like SW are meant to. Some local authorities even use them. You would have to pay but from what i was told the reports produced were admissible in court and helped fathers prove they are good and safe dads.

www.theappropriateadultservice.org.uk/

Wish you luck!

PS i'm not plugging anything so i hope i haven't gone against any forum rules by posting that link.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

  • Page:
  • 1
  • 2
Moderators: Samantha Downes