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[Solved] Final Hearing advice!

 
(@Akarou)
New Member Registered

Hi everyone,

I was hoping to get other people's either experience or opinions on this matter.
I am due to attend court for my final hearing on Friday the 19th July to settle the Child Arrangements order, and my Ex-Wife is still trying to block any fair access to my children.

Basically to put things into a couple of summaries to get everyone up to speed with the case:
• Children taken by Mother when she moved to Stoke on Trent in February 2018.
• Contact was stopped by Ex-Wife on false accusations.
• False accusations disproved and contact reinstated in a contact centre.
• January saw contact progress to the community. Family allowed to be reintroduced.
• April, court ordered overnight weekends back in Portsmouth and for my partner to be introduced to children.

In the last hearing in April Cafcass agreed to supporting a fair split of the holidays, exactly half. They also supported regular overnights in accordance to my work rota.

Now my work rota is that I work 6 shifts on (3 days, 3 nights) and then 3 days off. I originally pressed the court to allow me to have the children on every alternate set of my shift pattern that I was rostered off to have the children overnight in Portsmouth, which they did order as my children are only in nursery, and is not compulsory education.
However, my Ex-Wife pleaded for me to change my stance as she would lose public funding and my children's places in nursery. I changed my stance and worked to find a pattern that would allow the children to stay in nursery for their educational needs.
So now I see the children 3 weekends in a 9 week cycle. Specifically weekends 4, 5 and 9 in that pattern before it repeats again. I also had to have my employer sacrifice two of my working shifts to accommodate this pattern otherwise I would only see my children once every 9 weeks.

Now that everyone is up to speed with the current standing on everything my Ex-Wife is still presenting the following problems.
She is refusing to support me having a fair split of the school holiday periods with the children, something Cafcass supports me having based on the fact that she believes and is adamant that I should be the sole carer of my children.
I only have 20 days holiday a year and that is nowhere near enough to allow me to book time off, in order to have them for every holiday as she demands. I have proposed that the children should be allowed to be cared for by my family and partner also during some of these periods, as they are able and willing to take annual leave to do so in order to help while I work so I can provide.
My children have strong relationships with my partner and my family and my ex wife is trying to state that they should not be allowed to see the children unless they are in my care. Hilariously enough however, my partner and mother are caring for the children alone while we attend court on the 19th. No different to as they would during half the holidays.

So surely if Cafcass have recommended this then she should be supportive especially as I have been flexible enough to arrange my rota to allow my children access to their nurseries before primary education! It seems that I am the only one who is being child focused between the two of us and I am trying to be an advocate for my children by encouraging that they should have bonds and time with all of their family, not just myself.

Bearing in mind that there is 220 miles between us and a round trip of 8 hours driving, surely it should be endorsed that the children do have the fair split of the holidays, despite what my ex wife wants. Otherwise I am only seeing the children for a total of 16 weekends a year with up to a month between some visits. So surely half the holidays are required to maintain good relationships?

What is everyone else's opinions?

TL;DR

• Ex Wife is being obstructive.
• Cafcass recommends half holidays and overnights on weekends along with splits of birthdays and Christmas.
• Ex wife wants me to be sole carer
• Ex wife doesn't want my family or partner to be allowed to care for children while I work.
• Ex wife is denying half holidays based on her own opinion and wants.
• I have a work rota of 3 days 3 nights 3 off and see the children 3 weekends in a 9 week cycle without half the holidays.

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 15/07/2019 9:35 pm
(@bill337)
Illustrious Member

hi there,

from what you have mentioned, you have been reasonable and ex being unreasonable and silly.

most important thing is cafcass is recommending what your asking for e.g. half of holidays. this is so bog standard and common. Only reason why I did not ask for half in my hearings, is because I am self-employed and will not be available for most of the holidays. my ex opposed a full every other weekend. she did not want me to have the fridays lol. she failed 🙂

she also had rubbish added to the recital in the order, that my parents must not care for the kids on their own. though she knows full well they are so elderly, they can not possibly look after the kids!!

you should be fine. just agree with everything cafcass recommends, and courts will naturally agree with cafcass.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15/07/2019 10:02 pm

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