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TOPIC: Excuses for court

Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88429

Hello dads, so I've got my long awaited court date in a few days after it was adjourned because my ex didn't bother turning up with no excuse or explanation.

My solicitor has just phoned me and informed me that my ex won't be turning up because she can't get a child minder, baring in mind she's had five weeks to find one and comply with the court ordered DNA test that still has not been done.

My solicitor then asked me if I wanted to adjourn it again???
So I said let me get this straight, I've not seen my six month old daughter now for five months and you want me to adjourn court because she can't find a child minder, ha ha ha ha ha ha not on your Nellie love!!!

What do you think the judge will do /say??? And it clearly says on the court order that if any party does not comply with the order a summons will be issued,

Is child minder a good excuse??
Can I get my costs back???
What will the judge do??
Will I ever see my daughter???

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88430

Child minder is not a good enough excuse giving that she has had enough time to arrange care

Seeing your daughter is all in the balance of the DNA I'm afraid because if she isn't yours...you will have no right to see her

If she has been ordered to provide a DNA and is wilfully failing to obey a court order then she is in contempt of court

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88438

HI There,
.
I agree that not havng a child minder isn't an excuse, she has had more than enough time to arrange one.
.
I don't know what the judge would do, they may adjourn, thay may continue without her, each judge is different.
.
GTTS

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88454

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I'm not sure that you will have no rights if the DNA test is negative - it depends on the bond you have as to whether you can persuade the judge to order contact, it can be done. If you continue to fight for access after a negative dna test, that alone says something.

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88461

A. C. T.d the dna test is still not been carried out. My ex has had five weeks to complete this and find a child minder, and I'm sure that even may be the court could find a way to look after my daughter for the hour hearing we're booked in for.

First excuse for missing the first hearing was that my ex never got the court papers through.
So was adjourned for five weeks later, and this time she's put a bit of effort in, and no baby sitter,

Now the judge has said that they can make a finding that I can be awarded with parental responsibility in the absence of my ex.

I do not want this until I get back my dna test results. Also I've got to pay for the solicitors and she might get a small fine,
This is just unjust in every way.

I only want to have a meaningful relationship with my daughter and be the best father I can possibly be.

Five months fighting to get this far with no contact.

I feel sick

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88502

Daddysmissingbaby wrote: Now the judge has said that they can make a finding that I can be awarded with parental responsibility in the absence of my ex.

I do not want this until I get back my dna test results. Also I've got to pay for the solicitors and she might get a small fine,
This is just unjust in every way.


Im a bit confused so please forgive me....Why do you not want Parental responsibility until the DNA test results are back? You say you want to build a bond with your daughter but yet you have doubts she is yours?

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88504

Of course if I'm the father I want parental responsibility, a good strong bond, a meaningful relationship, but I've got doubts, and my ex lies constantly, so wouldn't any father want to know for definite if the child is theirs or not????

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88523

ahh ok now I understand, yeah you're completely right.

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88532

Well court went really well, declaration of parentage awarded to me, costs awarded to the ex, fast track to the fhdra hearing end of January and one of the more experienced judges wants to stay on my case, ex didn't turn up but she emailed the court to let them know that she could not get a child minder ( god bless) so all in all not a bad result,

Now does anyone know what a fhdra hearing consists of and how I need to prepare for this???

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88536

www.familycourtinfo.org.uk/i-need/what-w...ppen-at-the-hearing/

This might help explain it all. The outcome depends on whether the parties can agree on matters. His was a long while ago now but if I remember rightly the judge asked ex if she agreed to contact, ex said no so the judge said there was little he could do as there was also a non molestation order to consider (she got this by telling lies so she could get legal aid). I hope yours is more positive experience.
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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88537

Sounds exactly like my case, I've just been informed that because I've had contact before, so if she allowed contact even under terms, everything proceeding it was considered by her at the time the decision was made, by law???

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Excuses for court 1 year 11 months ago #88547

This is easy.
In "family" court let them speak. More often than not they will see straight through it. So her actions (not turning up) will say alot about her as a person.
However what i would do.....is be reasonable.......arrange and pay for the childcare/minder so she can attend court. It will demonstrate your a reasonable person (they like that). And on the flip side she doesnt turn up and youve told her that you made suitable child care options so she could attend. If she still doesnt doesnt attend and you can show how reasonable youve been to the court (arranging childminding) then thats super zero mummy points plus 10 daddy points.

Do not let her dictate and control the suituation. By agreeing ajurning your letting her control you. You dont get daddy points for letting it happen. She sounds like the type 'play the system'. She wont turn up but if you show how youve tried to 'help' out with her childcare matters. They will carry on without her.
If you care about your kid(s) enough to go court, dont let her hinder you dely opstruct proceedings. Beleave me she knows what shes doing!

Anyway best of luck.
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