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TOPIC: Re starting access

Re starting access 2 months 2 weeks ago #97230

  • diydad
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Hello, I am new to this and not sure if this post is in the right category, hope it is as it’s to do with re starting contact with my children. To put you in the picture over 18 months ago my ex told me I was no longer allowed to telephone the children and has since stopped answering the phone to me, I live a long way from them and it’s difficult to see them, I haven’t seen them or spoken to them for 18 months and I am desperate to see them and maintain a relationship with them, but as the months and now years have passed I am actually now afraid of the best way to contact my ex and ask her if I can have contact, and although I really love my children and want to see them it is actually easier to put off the approach that is needed to do this through my ex, and this sometimes make me doubt if I am in fact good enough to be a father, I am just looking for some support and advice from someone who may know what he best thing to do is either through experience or professional training.
Thank you

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Re starting access 2 months 2 weeks ago #97240

  • Mojo
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Hi there

If you’ve read through previous threads here, it might help you see that this is more common that you’d think. The children have a right to have a relationship with both parents, of course you’re good enough to be their father... you just haven’t been in the right place to push it forward. You may have to jump through a few extra hoops to achieve contact, but it can be done.

When the mother told you that you could no longer have contact, was that out of the blue, or was there a reason given, or anything that precipitated her decision?

Is there a court order for contact in place? How old are your children?

Have you tried writing to her? That could be your first step and depending on her response, or lack of, your next step would be mediation, but with the distance between you that might prove difficult.

I would try contacting a mediator in the area where she lives and asking them, in light of the distance, if they would be prepared to sign off the form, to enable you to make an application to court for a Child Arrangements Order... but try writing to her first.

Court is daunting but doable, it would also have to be a court in her area, but we have had many members that have managed to Go through the process with much success. It’s always better to have a solicitor, but manageable without legal representation too.

Best of luck

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DadTalk Moderator...

I'm not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.

I may not be legally trained... but I have plenty of experience and common sense!

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