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TOPIC: Varying a Contact Order

Varying a Contact Order 2 weeks 1 day ago #100877

Hi,
I'm hoping somebody will be able to suitably advice. I have a current Child Arrangement Order where my 11yr old daughter spends 2 nights each week overnight with me. This order was sought by me in 2017. I currently work shift work in a demanding role and over the last year my hours have become increasingly worse and I sometimes don't finish into the early hours and have lots of last minute shift changes. My daughter doesn't live that close to me and I do all the pickups and collections.

This is also the same in regards to her secondary school which she is about to start next week. Due to this I am no longer in a position to carry one with all of the midweek overnights. I have asked to drop two overnight midweek stays on separate weeks. One week I currently have my daughter two nights in the week and I do the same on another week. I have asked to just cut one of the overnights from each week. So I still drop her to school those mornings but she would no longer stay with me overnight.

This would take me to 6 overnight stays in a four week period and I'd not be changing anything else in the order which states that I care for my daughter half of the time when she is not in school during the holidays. This is not something I have chosen lightly but I am physically struggling with my work and the amount of week day overnight days I currently do.

My daughters mum has refused to accept the changes I have asked for and stated I have to continue doing 8 nights in the month, 5 of which are overnight during the week days. I have no option but to go back to court once again, which I really wanted to avoid.

Where do I stand with the courts accepting this under the circumstances, as I am really struggling with amount of weekday overnights I currently do and I don't really have a free day. If I'm not at work, I have my daughter.

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Varying a Contact Order 2 weeks 1 day ago #100878

hi,

in the order, does it state that mother has to make children available on such and such days... ?

if order does not state that you must have the children on such and such date, then you can simply tell the ex that you will not be available for mid-week overnights, and not pick them up. in my CAO i pick up kids from school on my midweek visit. if i get held up at work, i would just message ex and say i cant make it.

if she has an issue, she can apply to court. as its for varying the order, you both would have to go for mediation first.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Londondad123

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Varying a Contact Order 2 weeks 1 day ago #100885

Hi,

Looking at the order it does not specify I must have my child on such and such date. It just states that the mother must make sure that the child spends time or contact in term time for two nights each week.

I just want to drop two weekday overnights and continue with one full weekend which I do, one overnight Saturday and three overnights during the week

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Varying a Contact Order 2 weeks 16 hours ago #100893

hi,

ok, you could drop to the default position of the order, 2 nights a week. so just have full weekend. if she has issue with that, she can apply for mediation and to court to vary the order. i gave up trying to explain to the ex, what this order is really about lol. she is on some power trip and acts like the order is against me.

you can also mention that if you lose your job over this, how are you going to pay child maintenance? and does she know that if you were to go jobless and on benefits, you legally have to pay her £7 a week according to child maintenance service :p

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Last Edit: by Bill337.

Varying a Contact Order 1 week 6 days ago #100922

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Before you are able to make an application to vary the order you re required to attempt mention to try and resolve this.

Bill is right, the court can only direct that the resident parent makes the child available at specified times, the court cannot make the NRP have contact. Courts expect parents to show flexibility, situations change and parents should accommodate the changes here possible.

Perhaps mediation might help you both reach some agreement, if not the mediator will sign off the form to enable you to make the application.

All the best

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

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