i was in court earlier this year. thought it would be my last, but now have to return because of my crazy ex. I am being blocked from spending more time with my baby daughter. see her 2 hours a month as per my order. in recitals we both agreed on more time for me to see daughter after she turns 1. ex has now back-tracked and playing games. has no interest in giving me extra time to see kids.
i can not afford to hire a barrister again so am going alone this time. can the dads on here who have self-represented, please advise me on how to present myself in court? do i need to raise my hand first to speak to judge? do i address them in a way, like your honour?
also i would appreciate any suggestions for extending days I see my kids? I see 2 older kids every other weekend. school pick up friday - sunday 5pm. 1 mid-week every other weekend. school pick up - 7pm. i live 30 mins away. work is 30 mins away.
Hi in terms of how you greet the bench etc . Stand up when they walk in the room just to be safe . It’s more informal than you think in family court but I’d just ask before you start speaking how should I address the bench and they’ll tell you . When you want to say something just raise your hand . They’re used to people representing themselves . The court practically spoon fed my ex .
I’d ask for the recitals to be made into an order so they can be enforced . Shared care depends a lot on if it’s practical re your work , kids schools etc
Hey no problems . How old is your kid ? Not sure how it works if they’re very young but if for example they’re babies and breast feeding etc you’ll struggle . Depending on their age , can you do the school run etc etc those sort of things the court takes into account . Mine are older and I live 90 min away so no chance of anything beyond weekends and. School
my barrister said court don't like to make future age-based orders apparently. so in recital we agreed that i get few more hours when baby turns 1. then overnights from age 2. at time of my final hearing, baby was about 6 months old. so they put in order that i see her 2 hours every other weekend. i have 2 other kids, aged 6 and 3 now. so they squeezed the baby time in when i go to drop 2 older kids back on a sunday. so 1 hour with baby every other weekend. i did tell my barrister that this could be a concern, as ex could fool around when baby turns 1. will see if i can get every sunday with all 3 kids.
at moment i pick up kids from school on my friday-sun weekend. and mid-week from school. will ask for fri-mon, with school run. and try get mid-week overnights. maybe be asking for too much. don't know. in original hearing, cafcass said no to mid week overnights.
Dint ask don’t get I guess . As long as you can show to the court it’s practical for you to do so I’d ask for whatever you can , they can only say know . What did your barrister say about recital vs actual orders ? You can’t enforce a recital (?) my ex has broke both , so if you can get things in an order rather than recitals it might help you further down the line ...
yes barrister said technically the recitals are not part of the actual order. so i can not make an enforcement application. and he said i should seek a variation and to make recitals a part of the order.
Yup that’s what I’ll be doing . Make sure the wording of any order doesn’t leave anything open to interpretation . Mine does and the Ex takes the mick with it at the mo. Final hearing soon so will sort it then . If you think something is ambiguous or the Ex will try to act up make the court aware and tell them to spell the orders out in detail otherwise you’ll just be back again