• Page:
  • 1

TOPIC: Help needed

SUCCESS STORIES! 9 months 3 weeks ago #102754

Hi fellas
I am in desperate need of some advice please....

Ill try and keep this short.

Wife kicked me out for no reason in 2005. We had 2 children at the time ages 2 and 5 yrs old.

She stayed in the house and i have paid child maintence every month since.

We divorced in 2011 and i remarried in 2016.

Needless to say ... she wants everything!

At mediation... i offered for her to pay me 25k and i would sign house over. (House is worth 600k with only 10k mortgage left to pay). She said she would rather die than give me a penny.

So off to solicitors we went. She demanded to see my wifes bank statements. She wants half my pension and all of the house.

I also paid 80k off the mortgage back in 2010

She thinks that because she pays the mortgage with the money i give her every month that the house is legally hers

Anyway just had another shock. My son just turned 18 and is in his 2 year of collage...so i thought i could stop maintenance payments.... wrong. She is on the phone again demanding her money.

I just dont know where to turn. I am literally nearly bankrupt and she will notbstop till i have nothing and am in the gutter.

She has a bf living at the house and makes our son stay at collage in order to get her mpnthly benefits.

Our last solicitor hasnt pushed this much so i would appreciate some advice or recommemdations. Please


All the best guys,
T

.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

SUCCESS STORIES! 9 months 3 weeks ago #102759

hi,

i dont understand. you divorced in 2011, so why is this still going on till now?

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

SUCCESS STORIES! 9 months 2 weeks ago #102787

Go and see a solicitor or barrister for advice . She won’t get all the house and she won’t get all your pension.
There’s no firm answer in finances as nothing is formulaic unlike child support .
My ex took over a year to come to an agreement with me . Nearly 18 months so it would
Have been a lot quicker and cheaper for me just to go to court . If you do , use a direct access barrister , solicitor will just fill in all the forms you can do yourself and charge through the nose just to send to barrister anyways ..

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

SUCCESS STORIES! 7 months 4 days ago #104368

Hi, I’m being accused of domestic violence and recently attended court having been served with a non molestation order and occupation order by my partner. I submitted the same agajnst her and can honestly say I’ve been the victim of domestic violence and physical assault. I registered it with the police and they’ve done nothing , telling me the assault is time limited and 3 days over, when I fact it was 4 days within the six month timeline. Now I’ve got to go to a joint court hearing with no legal help, anyone know if I can get legal aid as I’m unemployed and now having to find money for rent

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

SUCCESS STORIES! 7 months 4 days ago #104369

hi,

check if your eligible for legal aid here: www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid

also google search for: pro bono representation. don't want to advertise anything here.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

SUCCESS STORIES! 7 months 3 days ago #104421

Did you have a consent order that clarifies what, how much and how long you need to pay maintenance? That's normally what would be required by the court,, after which they send you the Absolute... You son's age is material, if you pay maintenance the consent order will specify whatever you and your ex agree, in my divorce, it was until each child turned 18 and or remained in full time education, although the financial arrangements had he stayed in education would be withdrawn from the ex and payable directly to my son.

In term of pension, again this should have been agreed before the absolute is sent by the court, so it would seem strange if you got the absolute and the court didn't wait for the consent order to be agreed and signed, can't have one without the other, its the law.

What your ex cannot do is bring your new wife into play, her earnings, savings, pensions etc are all hers/yours and in no way can they be linked to anything between you and your ex. I know of men who have their own businesses, put it in their new wives name, get aid basic wage and contribute as little as possible, telling CSA they earn very little and off the wife new goes and earns loads from the business and the ex cannot touch it or indeed challenge it.

Sorry, not sure if that helps, but as I said, you can't have a decree absolute unless the court signs off the financial arrangement between the two parties.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

FREE: PARENT SUPPORT 4 months 3 weeks ago #105916

Hi, I am hoping someone may be able to help/offer some advice to a situation that I have. In June 2018 my wife decided to leave me and take my youngest child with her. At this time, she said that she wanted no money for me for him (in front of a witness) and that when our marital home was sold it would be split 50/50. This happened 14 months after the split and there was no mention of any payments for my child. However, I met a new partner and we were due to have a baby. As soon as she found out about this, she logged a case with the CMS and they sent me a payment calculation. I spoke with my ex and explained that she had agreed with me that she wouldn't want maintenance due to the fact that she took 50% of the equity from the house sale. She said she would be prepared to leave the payments for the time being. A short while after this, my new girlfriend had our baby prematurely and he died. This knocked me for six and my ex then started saying she wanted her CMS payments and that I had not been paying. I contacted CMS and informed them of this, but still she kept on contacting them and lying saying we had no arrangement and she wanted paying. Due to the stress in my life as a result of the loss of my home and baby I neglected the CMS and they subsequently set up pay and collect and deductions from earnings. However, due to the stress I was under, I had to leave my job and money was not taken from any salary. My girlfriend fell pregnant again, and again gave birth prematurely and lost our second child. To say my life was turned upside down is an understatement. Anyway, the long and short if it is that I have now turned my life around and although it peeves me, I am now able to concentrate on other things and will now be willing to make payments, but I wanted to avoid having to pay the 20% collection fees from CMS. I've emailed my ex to this effect but she has ignored me. My question is, if I contact the CMS and explain this, what's the liklihood of them believing that my ex is a liar and has previous verbal agreements with me which she has gone against, and also to revert from collect and pay to direct pay?

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Last Edit: by lisaisaliar.

FREE: PARENT SUPPORT 4 months 3 weeks ago #105919

You will remain on collect and pay. Nothing you do will change that. If there was any chance it would be if ex allowed it. The chances are that would highly unlikely happen either unfortunately.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

FREE: PARENT SUPPORT 4 months 3 weeks ago #105925

the "verbal" agreement won't mean anything.

Your best avenue right now is to carry on paying, develop some good history, tell the CMS your situation and ask them when they think they can review.

I suggest you don't bring up any of these "verbal agreements" and what not

With your ex, again develop some good paying history then ask. you're on a weak position so recognise that.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

Last Edit: by flyingember.
  • Page:
  • 1
Moderators: Samantha Downes