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TOPIC: Normal procedure?

Normal procedure? 3 weeks 4 days ago #104840

  • Kirsten
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Hello everyone....
The mother of 2 of my grandchildren has refused contact between my son and his 2 children aged 10 & 5.
The police became involved upon the mothers insistence and my son was warned of a possible arrest for alleged harassment. This was last week, when he was due to collect the children.

During this week he had a phone call from the Children’s Service ( I assume they used to be known as Social Service?) and during this particular call it came to light that my son was alleged to have dragged the older child down a flight of stairs with the hand of the child behind the child’s back.
My son was able to refute this and pointed out that the mother had instructed him “ to drag the child down the stairs if that what it takes” via text message. The child was sitting on the 3 rd step from the bottom and as soon as the child
got up he let go.
Anyway....Children’s Services are perfectly happy to have contact re-establishes as soon as possible but insist that my son makes a recorded statement at the police station.
Once they deem him not to be a danger to his children he will ( hopefully) see them again.
As soon as it is in writing he can also visit the school etc.....
I have never heard of this before.
Is this normal procedure?

Please advise us as to what he should do next.

Thank you so much
Take care
Kirsten

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Normal procedure? 3 weeks 4 days ago #104844

Your son needs to not text/ring or speak to ex partner at all now. If contact is to be arranged then you should ring /text his ex for now. This then prevent police arresting him and making contact with children even more complicated. social services cant actually stop contact they can only advise. to stop contact they would have to have very serious welfare issues where its an emergency situation.

You need as soon as next contact refused is apply to family court for a child arrangement order by filling out a c100 . you don't need to go to police station and make a recorded statement. if police had an issue you would be arrested, making recorded statements will make things even more hostile . I expect childrens services have already closed the case and ex partner text saying to do what it takes etc. all your son has to do is to say what ex saying hasn't happened and not factual if asked.

You are meant to attempt mediation before filling out a c100, but sooner you go to family court the better

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Normal procedure? 3 weeks 4 days ago #104845

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Thank you so much. According to Children’s Services he needs to speak to the Police so they can my son is no danger to his children and close the case .
I am a bit uneasy about this....I never heard anyone saying that it is down to the Police whether or not contact can be resumed....hence my question. Well...the mother has point blank refused mediation and we will hopefully be able to pick up the certificate on Tuesday and drop everything off at the court.....what a crying shame it had to come down to this.....the poor kids.

Kirsten

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Normal procedure? 3 weeks 4 days ago #104846

It is sometimes best just to go to family court and have a order drawn up where you have regular contact. police and social services should respect the fact you are going to family court as well to sort it out. they should close the case anyway and there is no need to speak to police as nothing happened.
if there was an issue police would of come round and arrested your son. make sure you maintain that he done nothing wrong and don't which is a common mistake get involved in mud slinging in family court. I would fully focus on concentrating on getting a great child contact order.

What kind of contact was your son getting before she stopped it all?

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Normal procedure? 3 weeks 3 days ago #104851

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My son and his ex( partner) had one of the most amicable agreements known to man and it worked well until this happened. My son moved back home and had the children 2 nights every week...more during holidays and if and when the need arose. Very informal but structured. During the last half term holiday he had the children for almost a week and he flew to Scotland with them both which they enjoyed. My husband and I were able to take the children and their cousin abroad for a week last year...they had a great time and often expressed a wish to go back to the place we holidayed at. So from all that to nothing is heartbreaking for all of us....

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Normal procedure? 3 weeks 2 days ago #104853

hmm your sons ex now you said all this clearly got on with you very well until latest incident. also he had a good contact order. maybe before you put your c100 in to family court is to write his ex a heartfelt email/message to try and resolve things in a mediation like way if that makes sense. It may just maybe might make her come round a bit especially where everything was previously fine. just a thought

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