Hello, and where to begin! I'm looking for advice on how to proceed with my case, and if in what my chances could be of being successful, or unlikely given the circumstances.
Our informal access agreement between us (verbally) stated I would have them shared time over holidays, eg 1 week with me, 1 week with her if it was a 2-week holiday. Also, I would collect them every 2nd Friday evening and bring them home the same Sunday in the afternoon.
Last October (2019), during half term I had my two boys (both under 8 y/o, eldest has autism) as normal. During that week while putting my youngest to bed, asking him if he was looking forward to going home, he said no. I asked him why and he made an accusation of sexual assault/abuse (he didn't understand any of this, it was more that the assault hurt) against my ex's partner who lives with them. I quickly got my phone out and recorded as I asked him again, he repeated it. I messaged her (kept all records of this) and I wasn't satisfied with her response, aka saying he never spent any time alone with the kids, although he would be responsible for getting them to school and picking them up, as he doesn't work, while she is away from 8am - 3pm daily.
I took them to the police so it could be reported, A case was started, during this my 2nd child came out with an admission that it had happened to him too. Both were subsequently video interviewed by specialist officers, while during them being with me at the time, I kept them until I was given the all clear to take them back (once safeguarding to remove him was put into place).
After I took them back to their mother, for school and normality and whatnot, from then, she stopped all of my access and contact with both boys. I obviously persisted to get contact with her, but she refused on concerns of the kids mental health during the case. In the midst of the allegations, she claimed that my youngest who made the initial allegation had claimed that I hit him (previously before this, but she didn't mention this until this point). It was more he said this about you, and I didn't believe him, so he is lying about these allegations etc. She stated that once the investigation was finished, she would reinstate access.
Once the police carried out their investigation, around Feb/Mar 2020, they concluded they didn't have enough evidence to proceed, an assumption by me is that they couldn't guarantee a conviction so they didn't proceed as it was his word against theirs. I asked her about reinstating my access, and she refused stating that something had came to light and that she was advised not to, she wouldn't say what it was and during our conversations numerous times, I was asking how my boys were, but she refused to answer or acknowledge the question.
I had a MIAM with a local mediator, who instructed me that mediation wouldn't be the most effective way forward, and that I should apply to the courts, also sent me the forms I needed and signed, to make my application to the courts.
I filed a C100 and C1A in relation to the abuse, fearing that something wasn't right. The kids had said they had told her about it but she didn't believe them, they told me and I acted. It feels like she doesn't want the kids to tell me things and feels like she is trying to replace me as the father of her children (I have parental responsibility as I am named on the birth certificate for both of my children).
I applied to the courts for a hearing without notice to take place on the grounds I don't believe my kids are safe as the alleged (her boyfriend) has moved back in after social services removed safeguarding. My experience with social services was limited, I had tried to get in contact many times but they never contacted me back, they never even informed me of their decision or process when they removed safeguarding. I only found out when I rang up about the case and they informed me they couldn't discuss it as it was closed.
I have been given a hearing date (14th May), but I have requested statements from the police in relation to to the child abuse case, although I have had to order birth certificates to prove parental responsibility to the police to get the information (this may take a week to do). They are going to send me my statements, in relation to the sexual assault allegation, as well as an incident which happened where she attacked me with a babies potty and her elder son from another relationship rang the police. I have also requested all the case details from social services, but I haven't heard anything back from them yet.
I have to prepare a statement to the judge for this hearing, but I don't qualify for legal aid at present, not unless I can show signs of abuse which I can't do until the police/social services send me documents I need, which they initially refused in relation to legal aid applications when I first asked.
So a couple of questions:
1. Do I have a case in family court in regards to their safety? I feel just because the police didn't take further action, that both my children aren't lying about the incident, with one child saying it had happened more than once to the police.
2. What is the best way to represent myself, what do I put in the statement, does anyone have any helpful guides or templates to assist me.
3. What is the likelihood of me getting custody, my access reinstated, and having him removed from the situation as I don't believe them to be safe?
I love my boys and would do anything, I miss them and feel I'm being unfairly treated as it feels like I'm being punished for doing the right thing. I'm not a judge jury or executioner, so allegations about him aren't my concern, my children's wellbeing and maintaining a healthy relationship which was great until all this happened, has been removed.
Any help and feedback are appreciated!