My ex locked me out of our home I shared with our 2 children after the breakdown of our 24 year relationship.
She changed the locks and I found a place to live, am paying maintenance for our 2 kids 15 and 12, but am struggling financially.
I've got to find a new place to live by Aug but will not have a deposite fir a new place, my has paid the mortgage for a year and a half but I did for 15 years, she wont release equity fir us boss and refuses to buy me out as she is on a fair bit more than me.
I couldn't live back there but am thinking of filling in an occupation order to test her resolve and try and make her become reasonable.
Can I fill this in on line or do I need to go the family court? How much does it cost?
i have very little knowledge in this field, but what I read and heard is that the court would not want to make children homeless. court will most likely
side with your ex
You can apply for an occupation order if you’re a victim of domestic abuse and meet the requirements. The order will say who can live in the family home or enter the surrounding area.
as shes refusing to split house equity, then only real option would be to take it to court, for a financial remedy. court can force her to sell/split property. but the children living there may complicate matters.
I have just been dealt an occupation order against me.
Ive been with my wife for 30yrs we have a 21yr old Daughter who has been living away at Uni for the last 3yrs and a 12yr old son.
We have a joint mortgage and i have been living and working in Germany since Nov19 until March 26th.
Since the Covid issue my daughter moved from Uni to stay with my in laws in order to concentrate on her exams.
My wife and i had a fall out on 2nd May, i left the house to difuse the situation as my wife is volatile and i didnt want her to cause a fight in front of our son.
Iam 51yrs old i slept in my car for 2 nites. Only to return to the house for a shower and clean clothes. My wife had changed the locks and removed our son who with myself had been on lockdown for 5wks.
I rang my wife who was in work and asked where our son was and where she was.
By this time she had called the police.
I have never ever so much as raised my voice to any of our family only worked like a dog and handed over 90% (£2300) mnth out of my wages for house keep.
She had moved our son with herself to her parents 4 bed prop and told me i could have the house she didnt want it and i couldnt see or speak to our son.
So rather than sleep in my car i had to break into our house as she would not do as the police asked her and leave me a key to the new locks.
Last Thursday at 1800 i was served court papers incl statements from my wife and daughter full of hearsay and false accusations for an occupation order.
And the court date was set for the next day Fri at 1400.
I was shocked to say the least, i had no time to do anything.
So the judge called me via a conference call. And went through my wife and daughters statement.
In a previous life 5yrs ago i had fallen into addiction caused by a close family death and my wifes cheating.
I sought help and still do, iam a model patient and told the judge he is welcome to my history and medical file. As that is solid proof iam telling the truth and my wife was using it as leverage to get me out.
I informed him the only other place i could live was at my 88yr old Mums on the sofa.
And the only record of violence recorded was my wife came home drunk and while myself and son were at home she smashed my company car up and the police removed her back in March 19.
So the judge saw fit to give her an occupation order lasting 12mnths if i come within 100mtrs of the house i would be arrested.
I was to pay half of the mortgage and half of a personal loan she got to repair the roof.
Iam now a 51yrd old guy sleeping on his mums sofa and still not seen or spoke to my son for over 3weeks.
Any ideas how to at least get the 12mnths reduced to 6mnths or a reduction in payments to her so i can at least afford to rent my own place.
Will there be much chance of me over turning this order by asking for my wife to prove any allegations and for me to be able to provide hard proof the allegations are false.
And also to challenge my daughters statement (sided with her mum) on the strength she has been living in Uni for the past 3yrs and is returning in Sept 20.
Basically both have said they feel uncomfortable with me being in the house and thats the whole reason.
I had been in Germany living and working for 6mnths before all this.
Finally i did tell the judge my wife has told our 12yr old Son all about my previous addiction problems in my view in order to alienate him from me.
I mean what mother would tell a 12yr old child those type of things about there Father.
Thanks for your reply. And yes it is very sad.
But with my wifes previous infidelity and with me being away in Germany for 6mnths and suddenly having to come home.
Iam fairly sure but have little proof she is cheating again and my being home is getting in the way.
But instead of doing the honourable thing and admitting it. .
She is using my prev problems as a hammer to beat me with.
And the courts have fallen under her spell.
Within a year of our wedding she had an affair which i suspected. I dragged her to counselling where she blamed me and i took the blame that i was the problem.
Only to find my suspicions correct 3mnths later as i caught her cheating.
We met in 1990 but only married 10yrs ago.