TOPIC: Access to my children

Access to my children 1 month 2 weeks ago #107667

Hello all. I’ve gone bonkers and I need some help.

Some time ago, my partner and I separated and we went our separate ways.

When she was preparing to leave, I were staying somewhere else in the meanwhile. We have two young children and she said she’d let us know where they’ll be. She soon stopped responding to my texts, so I didn’t quite know what was going on or when I could see my children. The next thing I knew she changed her phone number and I can’t get hold of her at all. I tried to contact some of her family members, to no avail.

Our relationship was always a bit up and down, there was never any domestic violence, so there’s no reason to keep me away from my children at all. Whilst together we still enjoyed days out and a few holidays together even through our difficult time, trying to make things nice for the kids, but in the long run it just wasn’t going to work out. Conversations for years had always revolved around her planning to leave me (I’d even overheard her talking to a friend in the kitchen about doing so), so it just came as no surprise, just this time when she announced it, I just accepted it, rather than try to keep us all together, as I just couldn’t do it again.

Apart from full blown legal action, I don’t quite know what to do or if there even is any other option. I’ve not seen my children in over a year and I’m not coping with that very well. My kids should have a father in their life. I just really miss my kids so much.

I had a telephone consultation with a solicitor which cost me, now they've gone quiet and won't repond to me. So they basically took my money then did one (I'll be going through their complaints procedure).

What do I do?

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Access to my children 1 month 2 weeks ago #107669

hi,

I experienced similar to you. don't call solicitors and waste your money. looks like your only option is court action. book a call with a mediator. should cost under £100. they would need to give you permission to apply to court.

court application costs £215. you can represent yourself in court and avoid costly legal fees. plenty of dads on here who have done it themselves, and can advise you. if your ex is claiming benefits then it will be pretty easy for court to locate her. you could also let her family know about court proceedings. can put down their family address on paperwork.

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Last Edit: by Bill337.

Access to my children 1 month 2 weeks ago #107722

Is a mediator an option for me? I don't know where she lives at the moment. I'm paying CSA, so she has had to have had an address somewhere, unless she used her mothers address.

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Access to my children 1 month 2 weeks ago #107724

Don't you just love solictors. I only got a resonse from the ones who did the consultation after an email telling them that I'm not happy and they won't be taking my case.

They're a firm based in Oxford and they're utterly useless. The woman I'd been dealing with just couldn't be bothered and the woman who called today in response to an email hand't a flipping clue. Utter shambles.

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Access to my children 1 month 2 weeks ago #107732

EarleBoneheadedRowney wrote: Is a mediator an option for me? I don't know where she lives at the moment. I'm paying CSA, so she has had to have had an address somewhere, unless she used her mothers address.


here is some info about mediator:

it mentions that you can be exempt from sitting a mediation assesment (MIAM) if you don't know where other parent lives. But you should have informal chat with a mediator and get their advice first.

www.familymediationcouncil.org.uk/family...ntly%20involved%20in .

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107775

Thanks Bill. In the meanwhile, someone did recommend someone who is a barrister. Got to be better than a know nothing paralegal.

I'm still not sure which way to go at the moment. I guess I lack confidence at the moment.

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107783

book a call with a mediator. look up mediateUK. their good. then next step would be to complete a c100 form. it can be done online and we can help you.

if you want to save money, don't have to use barrister for first hearing. its very basic. you can self-represent.

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107797

Thank you for the information, I shall take a look. Also thank you for offering help, I'll no doubt need a lot of help with this.

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107801

  • Jmax
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Hello,

To apply for a child arrangements order you first need to find them to do this try a find and seek order

www.thecustodyminefield.com/flapp/seekandfindorders.html

Hopefully this helps

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107803

i think its easier if he just puts down his ex's mothers address. i had no idea where my ex was staying, so i put down their family home address on paperwork. and it was fine.

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107863

Ok, so from that list I have found some mediators in my area.

Now, us men, dealing with this, are we best with a male mediator? I don't want to sound sexist, but are some female mediators biased?

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Access to my children 1 month 1 week ago #107884

hi,

don't know about biased mediators. i used mediateuk twice, and same guy took the call.

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