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TOPIC: Ex is constantly on my mind

Ex is constantly on my mind 3 years 6 months ago #69555

  • Lewy77
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Hi all

As some of you know i have had a recent break up, about 6 weeks ago so yes it is still new but its hurting so much and i just cant stop thinking of her and the kids, she was the one for me, had tattoos, both into the same kind of tv and things were amazing, she said we were soul mates but through no fault of hers i screwed up with the way i was, anxious, depressed, moody, selfish and i put myself before her and the kids and i was not there to support her when she needed me the most especially on one occasion which i wont go into but i let her down and i ended up pushing her away without realising what was happening until it was too late, i have wrote a couple of letters to her but not bombarded her with texts or calls that's one thing i have not done as i know that's not fair on her but i have not had anything back, i just keep wondering if she is going through the feelings that i am going through or has she forgotten me already, i know that all these things going through my head will not solve anything but just want her to meet me and talk about things and show her that i am making changes to become a better man than i was before, just so lost without her and miss her so much and the kids, i am trying to do things to take my mind off it but nothing is working and i know the old saying that time is a healer but she was the one, feelings that i never had before and we planned on getting married next year too, just really do not know what to do about things, i am sorry if i have said this before but i know that if i kept this bottled up then it would do me no good as that is what i done before but now i know that talking about it even on here is the best thing to do, just some advice would be greatly appreciated.

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Ex is constantly on my mind 3 years 6 months ago #69569

  • Mojo
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Hi Lewy...as you quite rightly say, it's much better that you get your feelings out rather than bottling it all up.

I wish I could give you some words of wisdom that would sort it out, but in a situation like this time is probably what is needed, she may come round...its still early days.

Sometimes thinking out of the box in your situation might get her attention. You've tried writing to her, but sometimes actions speak louder than words.... Send her a red rose everyday with a different love poem attached....it doesn't have to be that but girls love romance! Or start a keepsake box and start putting little tokens, poems, cards in one for each day of the month...and send it to her after the month is up.... Perhaps you don't like my ideas, try and think of something that will get her attention....it might work, if you can put a smile on her face you're halfway there!

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DadTalk Moderator...

I'm not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.

I may not be legally trained... but I have plenty of experience and common sense!

Ex is constantly on my mind 3 years 6 months ago #69595

Hi Mate,
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This is a really tough one, as I've said to you, everyone handles things differently, some bottle them up, some can talk and some just blank things out and try and move on, I know it's really tough on you as you were someone who bottled things up, but are now making the change to talk things through, I'm guessing your ex is either bottling them up or she is blanking it out.
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I think that as she hasn't answered your letters that you need to really let go, I know that's hard as you had such strong feelings for her, but you are making things worse for yourself by keeping the hope that she will answer and that you will be able to talk or get back together.
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How are you getting on with the counselling? is it helping at all?
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GTTS

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