Hi all, been a long time since I have been on here but I feel that I need some advice and support right now with the way i am feeling, I have not had contact with my son for nearly 18 months now for the third time but I have accepted the fact that as hard as i try his mum will always continue to make things difficult hence why I have not fought against it this time, I know some people may say i should fight but the stress etc is something I can not go through again.
Going back to subject i met a fantastic amazing girl last December and we hit it off straight away and for the first few months things were amazing, she has had an awful past especially the last ex in which i will not go into detail but police were involved, she also was not treated well with previous exes, come to the beginning of march and I notice things were not right, distant and the text messages were not the same as they were, she told me that she does not know how she feels and that she is a mess and can not get used to how I treated her ( I love her to bits and done anything for her) which I understood as I knew her past may well affect her at times, we carried on until the beginning of May and she broke down and I asked if it would make it easy if I walked away which is not what I wanted, anyway she finished it and we are still in touch and seen each other a number of times which led to other things, now to the part which is messing me up, her daughters dad treated her not well and walked out on her when she was pregnant after saying he wanted the family life etc and within a week he was with someone else, he was not part of his daughters life for 4 years then came back on the scene early part of last year, she admitted they have a close relationship and the other week she went away with him and their daughter for the weekend and she has been spending time with him and she has openly told me this, as you can understand my head has been messed up and I feel broken, she says she is struggling with everything and can not be around anyone or me yet she can be around him, is it a case where because there is no feelings she can be round him or is there more going on with the situation??? She has already told me there is no way they would ever get back together again but I have no idea where i go from here, do I give up on here which I said I never would? ( she is my first true love, never felt this way before) or carry on being here for her?? Her mum is not well either, I get on well with her mum and speak often to her and shes assured me nothing is going on between her and the ex, it is just a case where being with him there is no pressure as there is no romantic feelings there for him........please help as I am lost.
My feeling here is that this is one where you are best sitting down with her and having a very good an honest talk, and getting everything out in the open, including how you feel about her seeing him. I'm afraid that does sound rather simplistic, unless you want to try Relate to see if you can .