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TOPIC: Daughter contacted me after 20+ years

Daughter contacted me after 20+ years 6 months 2 weeks ago #97643

Update.

It’s now been nearly six weeks since my daughter first contacted me.

We had a lengthy spell of intense communication using Facebook Messenger and then we met several times, sometimes just the two of us and others with members of our families.

Now, my wife and I have had to move away, in readiness to start work again, in a different part of the country. Meeting my daughter won’t be an option until work finishes in November, so we will need to resort to communicating using Messenger, Whatsapp and phone calls.

I thought the first few weeks would be hard, the last week has been really difficult. As I said, we’ve moved away for work, but my daughter is not communicating with anywhere near the same intensity as before. I feel terrible when I don’t get replies to my messages, thinking I’ve done something wrong.

I do realise that life has to return to normal, my daughter has her own life, that I am a small addition to and I have my own life to get on with. Work will help to divert my attention away from my thoughts and hopefully help me to return to some kind of normality.

I welcome any advice on this matter. Many thanks in advance.

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Daughter contacted me after 20+ years 6 months 1 week ago #97649

  • Mojo
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Hi there

Perhaps she’s disappointed that you’ve moved away, even though you’ve only been back in touch for 6 weeks, she may feel that’s she’s been deserted all over again... that’s not to say that I think that, but she may do.

It’s said we have an inner child and perhaps it’s that part of her that is still hurting... it will take time.

It might help to tell her how you’re feeling, Have you asked her if you’ve done something wrong, or upset her in any way. She is as unsure as you and perhaps still exploring how she feels, with you leaving that may have made that more difficult for her.

Just keep the line of communication open, even if you don’t hear back from her, I would make a point of sending her messages regularly, she needs to know you’re thinking about her and that you distance shouldn’t be a barrier as long as you keep talking.

All the best
The following user(s) said Thank You: delfin821

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DadTalk Moderator... I'm not legally trained and my responses are my own views based on my experiences of the family court. I have plenty of common sense and can offer you emotional support and guide you to answers.

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