TOPIC: Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 7 months ago #44713

Mate you have no other option but to fight for your children, Imagine how they would feel in years to come knowing their daddy did something stupid or bailed on them, don't give your ex the satisfaction of beating you down man.

I know how hard it is mate I also gave up a 20 year cannabis habit when all this started I just couldn't handle my girls finding out I was a drug addict I was on the verge of suicide majorly depressed I went to see my doc and she said your fine it's just your ex thats the problem and you smoking weed.

I know what your saying about feeling lonely, I still do now and the sense of worthlessness not seeing your kids is awful, I purposely cut myself off from ALL my friends as they all smoked weed it took 10 weeks of feeling suicidal, sweats, mood swings, depression and no sleep before i started to feel better it was horrendous mate trust me but worth it all to have a straight head and fight for my girls.

I gave up djing, my photography my whole life I've got no family near me and not many friends but when you start looking after yourself living well eating well and doing exercise you can focus on the courts and fighting for your children.

There is families for fathers meetings all over the country may be check one of them out thats my next course of action keep doing your research on here and keep posting man, what stage are you at about seeing your kids this time around?

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I'm no way trained in Family court matters so don't take my ramblings as gospel but I've been through the Court mill and learned so much along the way I just like passing my experience on to other Dads who face this absolute nightmare from hell, you might not be able to beat the system but don't let it beat you :)

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45265

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Hey people, how's you all doing??..

Another week goes by and still haven't seen my boy.. 10 week's today infact, boy it hurt's!!! Just done another welfare check though and the police are on their way round to my kid's mum's, hopefully will spoil her family's chilled out sunday when the police come on over and look all around their house.. Don't think it make's a blind bit of difference but you have to do something!!,
Im still waiting for a hearing date too but all I have been told that it's possibly still looking like it could well be September time which is completely ridiculous, In relation to NannyJane, I tried to open that link but it doesn't open, could you do it again or mail be the link direct as I've tried to look on that website but don't know what I'm looking for... Hope you other guy's are all okay and hanging on in there.. any progress with your case's??
let me know

Ted

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45266

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Hi Ted - just tried the link and it's working for me. It's a PDF document, so do you have something (usually adobe acrobat) which can open these?

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45267

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Hi Ted

...that's strange, the link works for me. I can't send you anything directly as I don't have your email, but here's another link which might work for you

www.justice.gov.uk/downloads/family-just...eform/pd-12b-cap.pdf

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45268

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The link Ive just sent is also a pdf....sorry.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45269

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Im using a Mac, don't know if that's making a difference? usually pdf file's open for me with no problem, it open's with just the background and no writing... do you know what section it's relating to on the website and I will try and find it directly on there.
Thanks

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45270

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I'm using an iPad ...it's an overview of the new Child Arrangements Programme from the justice.gov website. I thought it would be useful as its a step by step guide to the whole process of obtaining child arrangements( contact and residence orders) and talks about how long you should wait from application to your first directions hearing.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45271

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If you google Child Arrangements Programme you should be able to find it ok....look for the justice .gov website or Family Law Week website.

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Mum and Grandmother, supporting my son who has residency of his son.
I want to see a much fairer system in place, where Dads and their children have a voice that can be heard.
There are many groups of people that have equal rights within our society and its about time Dads were given equal rights too.
Last Edit: by Nannyjane.

Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 6 months ago #45272

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Thank's again guy's for you reply's, i'll go on and check all that out.. From the research I have done the vast majority of case's tend to be around 4-6 week's from application process to the direction's hearing but the county court Im with, 'Uxbridge County court, they are useless, take's them around 30 min's to answer the phone any time I've tried calling and their excuse's it that their short of staff, proper bad isn't it.. No way that should be an excuse, government should be creating more job's there!! But anyway's according to them they are saying september and it's been a couple of week's already and not they haven't even listed the hearing yet... Loooonnnnggggg!!!

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 5 months ago #47412

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Hey Daddy's how's you all doing, Hope you lot have been enjoying the world cup other than the fact we were rubbish oh well nothing new there...

:woohoo: Anyhow just an update on my situation and any feed back would be greatly appreciated...
So it's now been since the 9th March this year (coming up to 5 months) from when I last saw my lil boy for about 2 hours (most probably not so little now I imagine) he was 13 months old then!! Deep down you lot can imagine what that has made me feel like but have tried to stay as strong as I can possibly be,
I have finally been given my date for a direction's court hearing which is the 14th July where I will definitely be asking for interim access to be re-instated of immediate effect, So firstly wanted to ask you lot what do you think is the likely outcome of that request and the chance's of how that would be played out??, I suspect at court if she bother's to turn up that is will try to be difficult and make up false allegation's of me smoking cannabis for which I do not and have even gone to my doctor about that to ask to have a full drug's test done for which I did a few week's back and have the result's all completely negative for any drug's..... 2ndly I am still awaiting the cafcass report and have still not had a phone call from them in order to have a telephone interview?.. 3rdly Just wanted you opinion on this possible scenario for instance If I were to be out somewhere I were happen to bump into them, I do have every right just to go and pick up my son and give him a hug or whatever, from what I hear I could even literally take him away also and then she would have to apply to the court for access?? I am not completely sure upon this so that's why I am asking you opinion's, there is nothing official in place to say that she is the resident parent and we both have parental responsibility I know it most probably wouldn't look good as I'd imagine she would start freaking out and possibly call the police but again from what I have heard is that the police legally cannot do anything about it and that she would be in the same boat as I am in right now with the roles reversed and would have to apply to the court ... I am sure this is something a lot of dad's think about and everyone's opinion's on all this may clear up what is going on in a lot of our head's

If there is anything else you lot suggest please feel free to add what ever your view may be..

Take it easy for now

Ted

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 5 months ago #47434

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You are right that technically you could take your boy, but I can pretty much guarantee that it will backfire badly when it goes to court - legally there may be no residence order, but in practice, she has been the parent with care since birth, and you have had little contact (through no fault of your own) so chances are she'd be in court within a couple of days for an interim residence order, which would almost certainly be granted, and she'd have on record what you did to warrant her getting that order - not something I'd want to be in front of any judge in the future.

I'd stick to doing everything by the book and let her make the mistakes.

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Nightmare scenario thanks to my wonderful kids mum 5 years 5 months ago #47739

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Hey there actd, good advice mate.. I didn't bother doing anything too silly, well nothing atall to be honest just be playing the waiting game ever since I last saw my son on march the 9th.... Just been holding out for my direction's hearing on the 14th July, less then 2 week's now starting to get a bit nervous!! I still haven't had my caffcass interview though.. I question I want to ask from you or anyone else who read's this is what do you suggest I do at court with regard's to asking for interim access to be re-intated of immediate effect and for how long etc and what the likely hood will be at this stage?? please let me know what you think

cheers

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