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TOPIC: Advice Needed

Advice Needed 4 months 1 week ago #100978


So I have offered X (Which is still more than CMS valuation for 3 nights or more) because I can not offered Y. Been told this is not acceptable and she will take me to court for my pension. (I have previously offered some pension in May and July when I first explained I was finding it hard to pay the value being paid).

Another thing I forgot to add earlier in the thread was that she is also receiving all the child benefit for the children although I have them half the time.

So now my phone number is blocked and I have been told I’m not allowed to speak to our kids when they are with her. Oh and her family have all removed my family off social media.

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Advice Needed 4 months 1 week ago #100981


if you have not signed up to CMS, then do it.no need to argue with her any more about child maintenance. as for court and your pension, i have no experience about this. You should get some legal advice.

regarding social media, ignore it and dont bother check her or her family profiles. my ex said if i want to phone the kids, then i have to buy a phone and give to her lol. i said sod off and forget phone contact then.

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Advice Needed 4 months 1 week ago #101002

Bill337 wrote: Paid £1 in to her account a week early and then paid the rest a little over a week late when conscience got the better of me.
there was a 19day window between each payments....within that time she contacted the then CSA claiming i'd never paid a penny in the two years since I moved out....and still claimed in court she didn't want my money!
Took me ages to get her to retract the claim because that's the only way the CSA would back off

LOL. why would you wind her up with a £1 payment? i was tempted to make a 50p payment to her at one point. but no point as she was already making false allegations of financial abuse/control and this would have backed up her claim.[/quote]

Bill, I did it to prove a point that it was all about the money...hindsight is a wonderful thing and I really should have just not pain the £1 to her....but somewhere in my head at the time it made sense to have a record of having paid something in case she went to the CSA which I was proven right that she did! .
anyway it proved a point at the time and reminded me of just what she was capable of.

As Bill has said, forget contacting her now via phone or messages, she'll use that as you are harassing her...trust me you don't want to have to fight that too!

register with the CMS and then seek a CAO (Child Arrangements Order) register for Mediation and get the FM01 and C100ready to apply, you have to have tried mediation before applying to court.

speak with your solicitor regarding her going after half your pension, not something I can offer advice on

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i'm not legally trained....i'm just a Dad going through hell to see his child grow up and become a decent man and human being.....my goal is simple...to be the father to my child like my father is to me...my hero.

Started this battle 2010.....who knows when the fighting will stop!

Parental Alienation is real and is abuse!

Advice Needed 3 months 2 weeks ago #101470

Hi so a bit of an update.

So me and the ex talked mid September and we seem to come to an understanding that October was hard for me to pay for full amount and I was to pay what I can afford. Then I would pay the full amount November/December then payments would be lowered for 9 months in 2020. After this she agreed I could pay nothing as we have 50/50 shared care.

So yesterday comes and she’s asks “have you worked out how much you can pay me” to which I say x amount due to the bills I have this month.

Well she wasn’t happy with this, calling me, saying she needs the full amount and now can’t pay her rent. Swearing at me and demanding I pay or I don’t see the children.

I explained I will call to discuss but was told “don’t call as she can not stand to hear my voice”

I tried to call, no answer.

After work In the evening I get a text asking if I’ve sorted more money. I ignore as it’s my weekend without the girls and don’t need the stress after working and having the children all week.

23:15 I notice 2 miss calls, and a text threatening if I don’t answer then she will call my parents (wtf).

I answer and was asked what am I doing about her rent. (She lives with her new parent but denies he lives there. My children tell me he’s there all time).

When I explained I don’t have it as I have my own bills and care for the children. Now again she starts shouting at me, accusing me of not putting the kids first and not stepping up to the plate. Saying I’m not to pick my children up Monday morning! Also saying she has told our oldest (7) about me not paying money and she’s offered her pocket money. This has upset me most as at 7 years old you should not be worrying about things like this.

In your opinions should I contact the CSA and get this all done officially?

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Advice Needed 3 months 2 weeks ago #101473

Oh and now the false allegations have begun!

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Advice Needed 3 months 2 weeks ago #101477

hi dadforever,

did you see our previous posts? yes you sign up for CMS, your not the benefits office lol. tell her to claim benefits/get a job and pay rent :) put your phone on silent/do not disturb when you go to bed.

sign up. and if she still blocks you from seeing your children, then you should go back to court and get proper arrangements in place.

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