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TOPIC: Going on holiday

Going on holiday 1 week 1 day ago #100989

Hi guys,

Just wondering if this is a common argument with your ex's or not but I have basically have a 4 year old I have ever other weekend.

Every year I go on to Spain to see my best friend and I stay 10 days to enjoy a lads holiday but my ex always gives me a hard time every single year she said "Well where's my 10 day childfree holiday" "How do you getaway with a lads holiday every year" well I simply repied well I have my child every other weekend the weekend I fly away lands on a childfree weekend and the weekend during my holiday my own mum will cover while I'm away that's how it's easier for me to have a 10 day holiday because I don't live with the kid so I only have to get weekend covered by my mum to have 10-14 days off

She huffed and said well next year I will book a holiday and you will cover me for a week ,But I don't find this fair because I have my kid every other weekend and don't want to lose my 28 holiday entitlement because of her holiday I said she need to get her own mum to cover the week and I will cover the weekend as normal

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Going on holiday 1 week 1 day ago #100990

Hi there Danbruno1105,

Seems like an interesting conundrum to have (my issue was getting my ex to even agree to me having a fair share of the holidays and international travel time etc).

It's great that whilst you've arranged your own travel, you've made appropriate accommodations for your child to spend time with the paternal family.

Just a thought but could/would you want to have this extra time with your child? Is there any approach where you could share this extra time with a relative? Of course, your own work commitments are important.

Or, is there a specific period that you'd already be using your holiday days at work that you could liaise with your ex so that the dates work for both of you? Just thinking it might be a nice/good thing to have the additional quality time with your little one...

Just my 2 pennies,
CD.

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Going on holiday 1 week 1 day ago #100991

hi,

i dont see what the issue is e.g. you have your child on your weekend. you drop her back on sunday. then from monday you have 11 days before you see your child on the friday i am ssuming?

so if your holiday does not interfere with ex's time with the child, whats the big deal?

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Going on holiday 1 week 1 day ago #100993

Thank you for your feedback guys,

Nothing ever seems simple i forgot to mention she has bipolar so even when you present a simple logical explanation she can't process it even tho I have sat back in my office at work and planned the holiday on purpose so my fly date on weekend is a child free one and the other is covered by my mum,

And some years I fly on a Monday if I can't get cover but flying on a sat always seems to work better


She presents so many grey areas one time she saw me shopping in Tesco and said "I'm so glad I saw you because now I can get a lift home" lol but I explained it's my day off and we are not a couple and she exploded LOL oops

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Going on holiday 1 week 1 day ago #100994

Not sure on the reasons for the child only being with you every other weekend, but would you not like to spend this extra time with your child and having a 10 day stay?

Seems to me you can organise and have 10 days from work for a “lads holiday” but why not use this time also to bond with your child?

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Going on holiday 3 days 4 hours ago #101069

Hi there,

I always book my own holiday with my child every year 1 at Easter and 1 around August

I also have 1 holiday for Me to recharge my batterys,I don't want to waste holidays on my ex Janauary is way too early in the year to lose a weeks holiday entitlement

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Going on holiday 3 days 45 minutes ago #101074

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strictly speaking, you are not infringing on her time when you go on holiday, but it does help to look at it from her point of view, she doesn't get the chance to have a long holiday to herself, and there really does need to be a bit of give an take to make things work properly.

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