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TOPIC: Fireworks litrally lol

Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 1 day ago #102248

Hi guys,

Not sure if any of you have ex wife's or gfs that you still do some activities with that always assume you will continue to pay for there tickets and meals and lifts on top etc.

The latest is I picked my ex up for Bonfire night and I was with our son that I have ever other weekend and she was with her son from a previous relationship that I have over once per month.

She gets in the car and says "Hope you have cash because I have none" I thought that was a bit rude because she was expecting/assuming I would buy her ticket and food for the night etc I simply said in a logical way I would pay for me and my Son and you pay for you and the other kid and she went crazy on me.

What's the solution things are really tense now

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Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 1 day ago #102249

Hi

I'm not a dad so I'm writing from a mum's point of view lol

I think it's lovely that you do activities together and could be a very positive thing for the children but I feel that you need to sort things out properly so you all know what you are doing before the activitiy ie you have worked out who is paying for what I think I would be a bit annoyed if I thought I didn't have to pay for anything and it's dropped on me that I do in car lol.

I do feel that you ex wife should be paying for herself definitely she is your ex wife for a reason I think you must of been soft on her in the past and she is trying to walk all over you.

Has for the child that isn't yours I'm a bit 50/50 on that score maybe because I'm a mother I do tend to treat all children the same whether mine or not this is your child half sibling at the end of the day its great that you do have your child's half sibling to stay over I think that's very positive, if you're not happy with paying for the other child you have got a right to say so to your ex wife.

I think you need to sit down with your ex wife and discuss some ground rules about activities when she has calmed down lol talk about what you willing to do and not do unfortunately people do take advantage that's life you just need to try and sort this out with her in a nice calm manner if that's possible.

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Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 1 day ago #102251

I think I have to agree with the other advice given. It’s unfair that she just expects you to pay. She is a grown adult and she should therefore split the costs.

Ultimately perhaps you write up something that states how you can share costs, or perhaps next time say I’ll get this night, you do the next - and keep it as friendly as you can.

Most importantly, don’t blame yourself for the outcome currently, she was being unreasonable.

Good luck
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Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 1 day ago #102252

hi,

if your paying any child maintenance to her, you tell her to use that money.

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Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 1 day ago #102253

Haha I Love this comment What a classic
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Fireworks litrally lol 1 week 6 hours ago #102297

  • Yoda
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This has been going on for an awfully long time hasn't it?

Perhaps don't go on activities with her or agree financial arrangements before the outing?

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DAD.info Moderator

I have several years experience supporting parents in family proceedings as a McKenzie Friend. I am, however, not a lawyer or barrister and my responses are based on my own opinions or experiences of the family court.
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