Ooooh - it could be amazing or terrible! Sometimes my patience with the kids is extremely low after just a day looking after them on my own. But some days with just family are something to treasure. I certainly think it would be of great benefit if more fathers could take longer off. I'd be more in favour of a scheme that enables more father's to take time off on full pay rather than simply extending the time available on statutory paternity pay - raising the level across the board, so to speak.
Re: A year with the kids
11 years 4 months ago #861
I like weylunduk's idea. I'm not sure you need two parents at home all the time and I feel for batman - I always think about small businesses when I see these new rules coming along. It's alright for big corporates but I think small businesses should be exempt from a lot of it.
On the subject of both being at home, I took the two weeks paternity plus a week holiday and felt very proud of myself. Recently, I was talking to the wife about it and she said she remembers wishing I was going back at the end of the second week: she wanted to 'get on with her new life'! Felt a bit deflated after that. :?
An interesting point is, to some extent, that it would level the playing field for those seeking jobs. As a family started, either parent could disappear from the workforce for x months. Employers becoming more able to equally select a man or woman for a job (given that they are both equally competent for the job).
...wishing I was going back at the end of the second week...
I used to get this even when I had a day off at home. It seemed to throw my wife's household rythm out of kilt.
...'get on with her new life'! Felt a bit deflated after that.
I have a strong sense that there are sooooo many readjustments that a newborn is a catalyst for ...
eg, nookie goes out the window for many months, baby becomes the centre of everything, dad is (potentially) fingers and thumbs in doing most things 'baby', dad is the second parent around in evenings and weekend (& takes baby extra time to attach with dad).
So on reflection, having felt pushed out with each of our 3 children, it was a necessary process for us as a couple as we shifted to family, putting the children's needs ahead of our own. I guess this is another strand of the maturing process as we grow into fathers.