Some things amaze me in life, the juxtaposition’s of wealth and attitudes to money are one. I sit writing this in a flat that I am going have to leave in four weeks because I can’t afford the rent, the electricity company are due to disconnect or install a pay meter on Wednesday. My financial problems are due to my ex-wife ignoring a request for a disbursement from funds we have had tied up from the sale of our house for over 12 months. As a student working party time and trying to see my kids it all takes time.
So here I am with 57p in my pocket and my dad about to transfer of £30 for me to get through the week with diesel and food. The most pressing thing that my wife is concerned with is for me to agree the private school our son will go to. It will be paid for by her father but there are no agreements that it will continue if something happened to him or my wife. So I can’t afford food to feed my boys when they stop over but I have to agree to someone else spending thousands on their school. I have had a replacement computer paid for by a Disabled Students Allowance and so I have a new laptop but not the money to drive to Uni to use it.
I grew up without money and brought up by my Dad, I know I can survive and will emerge stronger but it is a very tough road. Will my children understand the difference between the mum having money from her Dad, paid holidays abroad and private schools and being with Dad where it is more frugal or make do and mend? I hope they will but again being honest I am worried it may cause resentment in the future.
I am honest with myself, that my ex-wife is loving the situation of me having to literally beg for money. So am I honest with my boys? I am and have told them daddy may not have enough money to visit or have them over, I am also honest that the money that could solve the problem is being held up by their mum. I try not to be bitter or embellish – I know my children will work it out for themselves in time and I believe it will come back to haunt her but for now I am in surviving.