Dad dot info
DAD.info form. Ask questions, get answers

Dad Punditry Euro 2012

A key element of being a Dad is being able to bluff your way in any sport. Spouting off in front of your children in a knowledgeable and authoritative manner is an essential element to being the alpha male in the household.

This weekend Euro 2012 kicked off in Poland and the Ukraine. My kids are too young to make sense of it but that doesn’t mean that they should miss out on some top quality punditry and now, neither do you. Here is my exclusive guide of what to tell your children about the top teams competing in Euro 2012.

Portugal

Do say: The golden generation never fulfilled their promise. Can this new team finally make the dream come true?

Don’t say: I don’t care what happens as long as they get knocked out on penalties and I get to see that smug git Ronaldo cry

Holland

Do say: The Pass Masters blotted their copybook in the 2010 World Cup final. Can they go one better this time?

Don’t say: This bunch of hash-heads will never win anything

France

Do say: Perhaps don’t have the class of the side of Zidane and Henry but still cannot be discounted.

Don’t say: Too busy eating garlic and arguing with themselves to win anything.

Italy

Do say: Wonderful history and pedigree but will the corruption scandal overshadow their campaign?

Don’t say: The mafia have it all sown up already

Germany

Do say:  The efficient German machine can never be underestimated.

Don’t say: Two world wars and one world cup (not to mention two champion’s leagues!)

Spain

Do say: Football at its purest with Xavi and Iniesta weaving intricate spider’s webs in midfield

Don’t say: All this possession play in the final third is really boring. I wish they’d tonk it up to a big lad in the middle.

England

Do say: Hodgson’s appointment has dampened down expectations

Don’t say: It’s going to be a hat-trick: the Jubilee, the Olympics and the Euros. I’ve put the kid’s birthday money on Carroll scoring a hat-trick in the final against Germany.

Related entries

Too old for this

Too old for this

It was late on a Thursday evening and Rodger and I were walking up Upper Street in Islington, looking for a Thai restaurant. We were a little worse for wear   “You OK?” he asked looking at my awkward gait. “Yeah,” I said with that little inflection that indicated...

The big day

The big day

I could hear the rustling from the room next-door and glanced at my watch: 6:30 am. I groaned to myself but there was a certain inevitability about it   The kids bounded into our room moments later. “Is Uncle Steve here? Is he here?” They asked excitedly. “Yes,...

The big questions

The big questions

I was walking home from school with my five year old daughter. As we approached our front door she looked up at me   “Daddy?” she asked in that tone of voice that all dads will recognise as a precursor to something that they’ve been pondering. “Yes?” I answered...

Latest entries

21 Things You Didn’t Know About Japan

21 Things You Didn’t Know About Japan

The Olympics have started! Despite a lack of fans (crowd noise will be piped into the stadiums instead) the event is still as important as ever and makes for great summer viewing. So at Dad.Info we have rounded up 21 interesting facts about Japan to both liberally...

How To Have A Holiday At Home

How To Have A Holiday At Home

If you’re anything like me and flip flopped about for ages, unsure what to do about booking a summer holiday this year amid constantly- changing Covid news, then you’ll be finding yourself at home for the summer. But while we may not be able to dip our toes in the...

How to Create a Household Budget

How to Create a Household Budget

Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery. --Charles Dickens Money. It's not a fun subject, but a necessary one. Sorting your finances gives...

Pin It on Pinterest