Dad dot info
DAD.info form. Ask questions, get answers

Feeling old

My wife nudged me…

 

“Huh?” I grunted in my slumber. I opened one eye.

“You were snoring,” she complained.

I rolled over and went back to sleep. Too tired to complain about being woken up.

The following morning I woke at around 5am. The sun was streaming through the blinds in our bedroom. It looked like it was going to be a glorious day. I could hear the birds tweeting outside, bright and excited about a new day. The only problem was, I wasn’t. I was still tired after a good night’s sleep and the thought struck me – I’m getting on a bit.

I lay in bed reflecting that if you think about all of the things that signal the start of the long, inevitable decline into old age, I was exhibiting symptoms of them:

Feeling tired when you wake up in the morning – check

Waking up at the crack of dawn – check

Being the oldest dad in the playground – check

Coming last in the parent’s race on school sports day – check

Nostril hair growing faster than head hair – check

Visiting a garden centre more than twice a year – check

Not being able to run at less than 8 minutes a mile pace (my personal benchmark for 25 years) – check

Having definite middle age spread that may one day grow up to be a fully-fledged spare tire – check

Snoring – check

I blame the children. A handful of years ago I was a vigorous, energetic, thrusting young man. Now I was a hollow shell of my former self (well, perhaps not so hollow, perhaps a little lardy).

Determined to retain my youth, I burst into action later that day. I went on a live music frenzy and in a few minutes booked tickets to see Frank Turner at Ally Pally and Wolf Alice at the Brixton Academy. I mean, I can’t be old if I’m going to the Brixton Academy can I?

That evening I settled into bed again, dog tired after an energetic day running around after the kids and slowly put my book down as I drifted off to sleep.

A few minutes later, I was rudely awakened by an awful rasping sound. Grumpy at again having my much needed beauty sleep interrupted I looked around. It was then that I realised there was no-one else in the room and what had woken me up was the sound of my own snoring.

Now, that’s a new one for the list…

 

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the blogger and do not necessarily represent the views of Dad.info.

Related entries

Too old for this

Too old for this

It was late on a Thursday evening and Rodger and I were walking up Upper Street in Islington, looking for a Thai restaurant. We were a little worse for wear   “You OK?” he asked looking at my awkward gait. “Yeah,” I said with that little inflection that indicated...

The big day

The big day

I could hear the rustling from the room next-door and glanced at my watch: 6:30 am. I groaned to myself but there was a certain inevitability about it   The kids bounded into our room moments later. “Is Uncle Steve here? Is he here?” They asked excitedly. “Yes,...

The big questions

The big questions

I was walking home from school with my five year old daughter. As we approached our front door she looked up at me   “Daddy?” she asked in that tone of voice that all dads will recognise as a precursor to something that they’ve been pondering. “Yes?” I answered...

Latest entries

21 Things You Didn’t Know About Japan

21 Things You Didn’t Know About Japan

The Olympics have started! Despite a lack of fans (crowd noise will be piped into the stadiums instead) the event is still as important as ever and makes for great summer viewing. So at Dad.Info we have rounded up 21 interesting facts about Japan to both liberally...

How To Have A Holiday At Home

How To Have A Holiday At Home

If you’re anything like me and flip flopped about for ages, unsure what to do about booking a summer holiday this year amid constantly- changing Covid news, then you’ll be finding yourself at home for the summer. But while we may not be able to dip our toes in the...

How to Create a Household Budget

How to Create a Household Budget

Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery. --Charles Dickens Money. It's not a fun subject, but a necessary one. Sorting your finances gives...

Pin It on Pinterest