DAD.info
Forum - Ask questions. Get answers.
DAD.info | DAD BLOGS: Mrunal | Sixty Minutes

Sixty Minutes

There is no nice way of putting this, but I inhabit a world where children die. Last week, a beautiful little girl I know aged just twelve tender years old passed away after a long illness connected to her disabilities.

When all of us become parents, few of us ever imagine that we will outlive and have to mourn our own children. However, that is the reality that all too many parents of disabled children face. At least once a year, a child we know loses the fight for life.

Sometimes it is the disability itself that leads to the death. Some children are born and their very condition means that they are likely to be life limited. Others develop complications connected with their disabilities which wear them down. Sometimes, it is something incredibly mundane and everyday that overwhelms them – infections and viruses that most children shrug off can be fatal to children whose immune systems are run down by constant medical interventions or an inability to eat normal foods.

However, the fact that the risk of your child dying is greater does nothing to dampen the loss when it finally happens.  The sense of grief, heartbreak and emptiness we all feel can at a child’s passing can but be a fraction of what their parents must experience.

Moments like this give us cause to reflect. We all know that our children are the most precious things in our lives but like most people I sometimes forget. When you’ve had a hard day and your little one is giving you hell, it is all too easy to lose your temper at them. In the hustle and bustle of modern life, it is all too easy to forget to prioritise that crucial hour a day that you promised you would spend focussed completely on your children.

However, tonight, take a moment and make sure you spend that hour with your child. Give them a big hug and remind them how much you love them. Because, somewhere, there will be a dad who wishes he could have another hour with his child, who would give everything he has to spend another precious sixty minutes laughing, playing and holding the most precious thing in his life but knows that he never will.

Related entries

Too old for this

Too old for this

It was late on a Thursday evening and Rodger and I were walking up Upper Street in Islington, looking for a Thai restaurant. We were a little worse for wear   “You OK?” he asked looking at my awkward gait. “Yeah,” I said with that little inflection that indicated...

Too old for this

The big day

I could hear the rustling from the room next-door and glanced at my watch: 6:30 am. I groaned to myself but there was a certain inevitability about it   The kids bounded into our room moments later. “Is Uncle Steve here? Is he here?” They asked excitedly. “Yes,...

Too old for this

The big questions

I was walking home from school with my five year old daughter. As we approached our front door she looked up at me   “Daddy?” she asked in that tone of voice that all dads will recognise as a precursor to something that they’ve been pondering. “Yes?” I answered...

Latest entries

Separated parents at Christmas: how to make it work

Separated parents at Christmas: how to make it work

If you're separated from your partner and sharing custody, Christmas can be difficult. You might not be seeing your children on Christmas Day. How do separated parents do Christmas? There is no right or wrong way. A number of factors will play in to the arrangements...

Budgeting tips for single parents

Budgeting tips for single parents

For single parents it's not just the lack of support that is overwhelming, but also managing on one income. It can have a real impact on your wellbeing. Thankfully there are free resources available to help you with budgeting and managing debt. Read on to find out our...

Single parent benefits

Single parent benefits

Raising children is an eye-wateringly expensive business- particularly in a cost of living crisis. But when the burden falls entirely to one parent it can feel especially stressful. In 2023 the cost of raising a child in the UK rose to £166,000 for a couple and...

Pin It on Pinterest