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Hi
I currently pay my ex £250 a month for my 6 year old daughter ( plus I buy my daughter clothes etc and pay for clubs) as an agreement between ourselves. After dropping my daughter off after a week away I got a text stating she now wants £300 or she will go to the CSA. After a quick calculation on he CSA website I should be paying £220 ( the difference will still be spent on my little girl) .... The main issue is the amount of overnight stays. I have my daughter approx 80 nights but my ex states she will say on the forms I have her less. How do I prove how many overnights I have her ?
I know it's not right but I have to make a stand because if I say yes to the increased amount in a few months time she will demand more and it will never end 🙁
Thanks for any help and advice
Dan
i would keep a diary of when your daughter stays with you, also...do you have an agreement on the time your daughter stays?
Hi
I have been apart for 3 years and as petty as it may seem ( I knew this would happen) I keep a record of every time I see her, even for an hour.
We have agreed she stays every other Saturday night and I cover 5 weeks school holidays which she stays every night. She cannot stay in the week due to the hours I have to work but if I'm off she will stay over and I do the school run etc. This is not in writing, it's a or what I thought a mutual agreement to keep things out of the courts. I must add that I get this demand after learning from my daughter that mummy and her new partner are buying a bigger house !
Thanks
only thing i can suggest is keeping doing what you are doing...give your ex what the CSA require you to give and no more....your daughter isnt going to go without...you sound like you will make a point of that.
im in a similar position...my ex trying to fleece me for £200 towards school uniforms when i know she gets a voucher from the council...then find out from a friend she posted on facebook that she is decorating her bedroom....glad i didnt buckle and end up paying for her decorating.
your kid will know you love her and will do anything for her...exs seem to think that we have an obligation to support them and not just the kids.
stay strong.
Cheers Gordy71
After 3 years I have finally found the strength to say no...and your right, I would do anything for my daughter and she will never go without. What I now do is rather than give many towards shoes etc I get them myself which my ex hates 🙂
lfc - buying stuff for you daughter instead of giving the money to your ex is an excellent move, it means that your daughter knows that you are buying them for her and it also gives you time together going shopping, which children love 🙂
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