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Hi all im James, first time visitor here with a new problem. hope it makes sense ( spelling etc not my strong point )
My ex and i separated in Jan 10 and divorced soon after as she was convicted of some nasty things including theft and getting us into huge debt.
We have a son who is 11 next month and since we split i have been paying £100 per month plus extra moneys for uniform, trips, cub camps, etc which is the amount we agreed when i left and that is how things have been up until this month.
At the start of Feb my boss told me the CSA had asked for my wage details which i thought was odd so i asked the ex why they would be needing it as we had our own arrangements set up ? She told me she had decided to start using the CSA as she had worked out she could get more money per month out of me that way .
I knew that would be the case but i had been paying extra towards the things he needed and i do have him over for tea on weds and overnight at weekends and have always taken him out places and i don't earn a fortune but what happened next has been a big problem for me !
I phoned CSA to see what was going on as i had no letters or contact from them yet and they informed me that i am in £1700 arrears as the ex has had her claim in since Sept 2010 ! and that they had sent an attachment of earnings order to my boss to pay these off plus normal payments which would come to £533 per month for the next 5 months ! leaving me around £700 to pay everything i need to and live on.
Now the fact is that the CSA have never contacted me,
The ex never said to me she had a claim in with them,
We had a agreement between ourselves that i always paid into,
I had no idea the CSA wanted to get intouch with me,
She had threatened me with CSA many times if i didn't always give her extra money for some things she wanted straight away but when it would come to the end of the month she would ask me for the maintenance money and i would say i thought you were going through CSA ? and she would tell me she wouldn't if i paid her so i did.
After may calls now to CSA who couldn't give me any specific information or manage to send me some sort of statement of arrears yesterday i finally got some info from them.
It turns out that following an argument back in Sept 2010 ex must have rung CSA and put a claim in saying i was refusing to pay so CSA started a file on it but ex didn't give my correct address or phone number so they haven't been able to contact me at all until now when she has decided to ring them back up 2 + years later .
The problem is for her i have kept all the texts from her demanding money or she`ll use CSA and texts saying how shes apparently rung them to say we have a private agreement so i would give her the cash at the end of the month ect.
So if you have a private agreement or whatever they call it between me and ex to pay £100 + extras for all this time can she suddenly now claim for back pay even tho i had no idea she had opened a case with them and given the wrong contact details for myself ?
bearing in mind i have texts from her stating we are NOT going thru CSA ?
Why do we trust these people !
Any advice appreciated
Blimey what a shock, can you get your ex to write to the csa and explain she has been receiving the money and to drop the claim ?
Send the texts to the CSA to show you've been paying something, but unfortunately, at best they will deduct these payments from the arrears, not take them as an alternative to the payments they've calculated, and you may have trouble getting them to take them into account at all. Also, contact your MP as soon as possible and ask them to intervene - you are going to have to pay the arrears, but because this is not of your doing, your MP needs to speak to the CSA about giving you longer to pay the arrears.
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