[Solved] My Ex lied to get pregnant now wants money!

This sounds so very tough for you right now. I can understand your anxiety. Have you sought any legal advice yet or is it just what you've heard about the CSA?

Hi Walton and welcome.

I'm afraid you have no recourse at all as to whether she tricked you or not - the simple fact is that she is pregnant by you and legally you are required to pay maintenance, the law regarding maintenance does not concern itself with how or why it happened. It may be worth looking at your options regarding your debt - I think we still have the services of the CCCS so it could be worth posting a question on their thread and we'll try to get some advice on this.

You do have rights as to contact once the baby is born - if she won't put you on the birth certificate, then you can apply through the courts for PR, and with your level of income, you may be entitled to legal aid - I know this isn't your question, but I really would consider having contact as it's something you may well regret later if you don't.

Hi thankyou for replying,

All i know about the csa is that they are brutal and dont give a [censored] if you are struggling to survive they just want money off you.
I havent sought any legal advice as i cant afford it and as far as having any contact with the child is concerned, that will be very difficult considering she is moving 200 miles away to be with her family! I have been totally used just for a sperm donation!
I will have around £30 per week to live on once i start paying maintenance, she has boasted to me that she can get a two bedroomed house and an income all paid for by the benefits office!

I'm finding it hard to beleive that the law dosent offer some protection for men in my situation and I would love to hear from dads who this has happened too.

The stupid thing is that once she starts milking me dry for "every penny" I will not be able to sustain myself and will undoubtedly end up homeless and also on benefits! Who does that help? Certainly not the child!

I dont think people realise how much this goes on, warning to blokes! Do not trust any women with birth control and never sleep with a women unless your happy fathering her kids with the possibility she can kick you out her life anytime she wants, stop you seeing your children and take you to the csa to pay maintenance for the children you never see!

I have learned this lesson the hard way.

this sort of thing really annoys the [censored] out of me you where more than happy to sleep with her on how ever many times u did the pill is not 100% myself and my brothers are ever dent to that so if your not ready to be a farther then you have a few choices don't stick it in or put something on the end of it if you do

Much the same mate i was tricked into it, she told me she was on the pill it was a 3 week fling. 13 years later i'm in this situation

http://www.dad.info/dad-talk-forum/finance/15736-csa-arrears-and-benefit-advice-please

although i do feel sorry that u feel that u have been trapped into this situation, i do have to agree with farndon. i was in a similar position, where i didnt WANT to have any children with my ex, she fell pregnant whilst on the pill. however, once she decided to have the child no matter what i wanted, it was going to be MY RESPONSIBILITY to ensure that i provided for my child. i appreciate that times are hard (i pay for 2 sons and im on a [censored] wage!!), but u need to do what is right by ur child. after all its not their choice to be born! no matter the situation, ur child will always be ur child, and as long as u do whatever u can, just try and make sure its the right thing. i hope things work out for u, and whatever happens, i hope things turn out in the best interests of the little one.