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ello
first i must say i'm the step mum to my partners 13 year old son, he has had full custody since 2008 due to the mother having mental health issues. she has had constant access to tom and my partner has bent over backwards to ensure that.. tom went to visit her on the 5th may, she has refused to send him home or allow any contact from his dad, he's 13 and in our eyes doing the typical teenage rebellion thing and my partner is trying to tread lighlty to avoid another mental breakdown from the mum.
our main problem right now is the attitude from the school, they seem to be very sympathetic towards the mum and refusing to communicate with the dad even though they are aware he has been the full time parent. its driving him mad the way they are treating him like an abuser while encouraging the delusions of the mother.
we've been to the police and they will acompany my partner to retrieve his son but bless him he's scared because he knows what sort of affect this will have to his ex's mental state, and yet again he will be blamed for her breakdown.
Bren - welcome to DadTalk.
Wow what a situation to be in. Sounds like your partner is doing all he can to not antagonise his ex in anyway. This must be painful for you both.
As your partner has Parental Responsibility, I would imagine, that the school has to engage with him. Would you like me to get the Coram Children's Legal Centre to offer you some advice regarding this?
Gooner.
Dear Bren,
Thank you for your query.
Firstly, as your partner has a Residence Order he may wish to contact the police again to have his son returned to him, or if he has concerns then he could contact Social Services to investigate the mother. Additionally, if you feel your step son is at risk of harm then your partner could apply for an Emergency Residence Order through the court to have him returned, but it will be at the discretion of the court whether to grant this Order and is generally only applicable if a child is considered to be at serious risk of harm.
If you did wish to apply for an Emergency Residence Order then you must do this under a C100 form which you can obtain from either your local court or online via www.justice.gov.uk. Once you obtain this form you must lodge it at the court closest where the child is living. There is an application cost of £200, but if you are eligible for legal aid then you may wish to obtain an EX160A form from either the Justice website or the local court as this may either waive the application cost or reduce it.
Once you lodge this form you must explain to the court Clerk that it’s an emergency application, but it will be at the discretion of the court to decide whether it is an emergency, and further, whether to grant the order. If they do grant the order then the mother must then return your step son.
In regards to the school we would advise that you try to liaise with them about the difficulties that you are having with the mother and to discuss your concerns with them. However, if you are not happy with the way the school are dealing with the matter then you may wish to make a formal complaint to the head teacher by following the school’s complaints procedure.
If you have any further questions please contact us again via our webchat facility. The link to our webchat is http://www.childrenslegalcentre.com/index.php?page=web_chat.
Yours sincerely,
Coram Children’s Legal Centre
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