Hello, this is my story and I ask help please.
I was 26 yearsl old, I arrived in the UK and I met a girl.
We discovered she was pregnant,then we decided to continue seen each other in order to support her and taking the responsibility we must take, even without being bf or gf.
She didn't have any money . Then I bought a car to participated to all the visit, we did the DNA non invasive test just to be sure. This the introduction.
2017 our beautiful baby girl was born,then she moved 20 miles away from me in a homeless room the government gave her and I visited her every other day.(I worked 46 hour a week). I ve also paid weekly the necessary.
Once I discovered she hasn't put me on the birth certificate when the baby was 3 weeks, the situation has started being problematic and we discussed a lot for nothing.they gave her another indipemdent house this time luckly 10 miles from me and she arrived at the point : or you are speak and agree with me or you don't see the baby.
I was going crazy and I couldn't stand this repeatitive approach of submission anymore, I literally needed a break.
For two month I haven't seen my baby against my will,without knowing what to do and without being aware about parental rights and looking for solution in this unknown system and I have discovered mediation.
With them, I have asked to see the baby, and she answered that I ve abandoned my daughter and she suffer from separation anxiety to the mum (...).
Result: in the beginning I ve seen my baby with the mum presence in a coffe, after three months of mediation I could see her finally alone twice a week one morning and one afternoon a week! Yee. Cost:150 pound.
Now she has one year, for 4 months everything fine, not lots of discussions, I just see my little one and pay,but still she doesn't have any link of identity as a surname(secondary importance) and I m not named on the birth certificate, that means I m doing my duties but I don't have rights,pretty much on the little one's interest.
Conclusion:
I would like for her to have the double surname and put me on the birth certificate, i give the 11% of my salary and I would like to do it with peace of mind, giving a timeline of two weeks. Asking please, let s avoid me going through court (even if I have no idea what does it means) .
She said that maybe she is considering it, but even before start thinking of it we must be agree on some unknown stuff, and as everytime they ll be ridiculous comprises or agreement that will make me, not accepting them, the one that doesn't want to be on the B.C.
Example
(If you don't bring me there at that time, u won't see the scan,that means you don't want to see it. emotive blackmail--- if you don't speak with me, I won't show the baby, then you ve abandoned your daughter .emotive blackmail.---etc, I think is clear.
I would like to know what court can do, i would like this blackmails to stop but I don't have the knowledge about my rights and how to prevent problems! . Will court give me my rights?
I m kind of afraid to be honest ,and in the same time quite bored about all this situation. I m sure other dads colleagues have passed the same .. thank you all.
Hi. A court is able to give you Parental Responsibility and to order that your name is added to the birth certificate. In reality, that doesn't give you any real additional rights, though she is supposed to consult you about major issues such as health and education - but consulting you doesn't mean that you can override any decision she makes. A court certainly won't order that she is given a double barrelled name, so I'm afraid you won't get anywhere with that one.
Hi there
You can apply to the court for Parental Responsibility, once the court signs the order you can apply to have your name added to the BC. Heres some information about it
https://childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/parental-responsibility/