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Good afternoon all,
my ex-wife has, in the last few days withdrawn contact with my kids. This is a contact that has been well established for 2.5 years now. It is on the basis that she has made a complaint to the Police against myself and my Dad. As it stands I have now not seen my kids for the longest period of time in their lives, I am told the police can't tell me anything about if there has even been a complaint or the nature of any complaint. My lawyer and hers spoke on the phone and the strong impression is that there has been some kind of complaint made but that her lawyers are questioning the seriousness of it. I know that the complaint must have been made on Wednesday at the absolute latest and so it seems incongruous to me that a complaint that is serious enough to withdraw my access has not required the police to speak to me for at least 3 days now. Anyone have any ideas?
If your ex has made a serious complaint against you, I would have expected them to have investigated it by now.
You mention that the complaint has been made against both you and your father? Has anything happened recently to warrant a complaint of any kind?
What kind of relationship do you have with the mother? Was the contact you have enjoyed for the last 2.5 years agreed mutually or do you have a contact order in place?
Hi there. The contact is part of a separation agreement. The day in question, my Dad hardly saw the kids, I had to go to a conference at work and hardly saw them either. Without going into detail, this weekend, I was meant to be having my oldest daughters party at mine, and she was supposed to be going to the ballet with my girlfriend, (she is 8 on the 10th October). I'm very suspicious altogether. Apparently, according to her lawyer, she has asked the police to speak to the children before speaking to me or my Dad. Nothing had happened on the day in question or any other day for that matter to warrant any kind of complaint, as far as anyone knows. The kids are part of a wider, very together family when with me, they were with their Uncles, Aunts, Grandparents and GREAT Grandparents at 93 years old(!) on the day in question. Everyone is telling me to go to court asap but I dont want to put the kids through any more unnecessary stress. It seems though that since she had an application for legal aid knocked back, her behaviour has deteriorated. I suspect that this is a way to provoke me into starting legal action, (as she will then regain legal aid to 'defend' herself).
Hi there
I too would have thought that the police would have wanted to speak to you by now. My sons ex made a complaint about him regarding his son and they came immediately, twice in fact....after speaking to him they actually took his side, but thats another story!
The police are usually loathe to get involved in "domestics"....perhaps thats why you havent heard anything. Its the weekend and so its highly unlikely you will find anything out until monday. Try not to worry about it too much, as you say, you've done nothing wrong.
It such a shame that your daughter missed out on her party and the ballet but I'm sure you'll be able to make it up to her. Just see what happens next week and if the fur is still flying, think about mediation. Court is always the last resort, after all other avenues have been exhausted. However if it does go to court, I have no doubt that you will get back all the contact you enjoyed with your children before this unfortunate incident.
Good luck with it all.
Hi,
I've had a look at some of your other posts and have a better sense of your situation. I think you're absolutely right and that the mother is motivated to reduce contact in order to increase revenue from child maintainenece.
I see you have legal representation and would recommend that your solicitor guides you on how to proceed, especially as all of this is subject to scottish law and I'm by no means an expert on how they deal with these matters north of the border. I wouldn't imagine it's not too different though.
If she reduces contact I would imagine that you could expect a court to reinstate it to the level that you had previously enjoyed and protect it with a contact order. The only way she can justify a complete withdrawl of contact is if there were some kind of welfare issue and I think this is what she's attempting to do, but I suspect the authorities she has contacted have seen through it and aren't taking any action. Her own solicitors seem to have been wrongfooted by this turn of events, so hopefully this can be resolved without the intervention of the courts.
Good luck!
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