Hi guys. Been reading through a few pages on the net and this seems a decent site with good answers coming through.
My dilemma is this: I have a court order - child arrangement- that's been in place over a year. I took my ex to court as she denied access. Went through mediation- purely for their signature that allowed court proceedings to start and easily gained acces to my child. I have built as great relationship with my little one and she sees my side of her family regularly. I have parental responsibility but my ex refuses to let m have my child around my partner. I have been with her three and a half years and we have a daughter together, she's one and she has a son from a previous relationship who is 8. Previously my ex has allowed my new gf to look after our child, but after a disagreement between them will not let me see her if my gf is there.
This has obviously made it difficult when I have her at weekends and stops me seeing my other child every other weekend. Since I have a contact order can she do this? I don't want to rock the boat or my ex will revert it to the original court ordered times and days. I feel almost blackmailed into doing what she wa to to avoid missing out on time with my eldest.
Any help or advice appreciated. Thanks.
Hi There,
.
Unless your new partner would cause a safety concern (which I'm sure she doesn't) then there is no reason for your ex to stop you from all spending time together.
.
The best way forward would be through mediation, start that process and if your ex won't agree in mediation or won't attend, then the mediator will sign a form so that you can apply to court, from what you have said the judge is probably going to support your application, to move things forward and should help you sort out the issue of spending time with your partner. As you have managed to agree to extra time already and that has been happening, you could while applying to court ask them to make that part of things official and written into the order.
.
You would need to apply for a variation to the original order.
.
You could just start spending time with your partner when you have your daughter, and see what your ex does, but as you say this probably won't go well.
.
GTTS
I can understand why feel that you have little choice, as you have been able to progress the original order, she could revert back to it if you rock the boat.
I doubt she would want to return to court, so before you take steps in this direction, you could write to her formally and ask for her to agree to your partner and your child's half sibling becoming involved during your contact time. It's not fair to your older child that she's being prevented from developing a bond with her younger half sibling, due to an argument that happened in the past. Explain how her current ban on your partner, makes contact difficult and places limitations on your time with your child. Perhaps suggest a meeting between the three of you to try and sort this out, for the children's sake. I would also explain that if you can't work through this problem you will be forced to mediation and failing that a further application to court to vary the order and have the progressed schedule incorporated into a new order and agreement from the court that your partner and other children should be involved during contact. Tell her that this is a last resort and you hope that common sense will prevail and you can resolve this to everyone's satisfaction.
Keep it civil and non threatenening, but at the same time leave her in no doubt that you are no longer happy to leave things the way they are at present.
Best of luck