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I posted on here ages ago when my ex refused me contact with my son for 3 months when he was 7 months old. I just wanted to re-post with some words of encouragement as we are slowly getting somewhere!
We agreed in mediation that I would see him one day at the weekend every week at my parents house as my ex didn't want him coming to our old house where I still live with my new partner (met after I separated from ex and can't sell house due to negative equity.) This has taken a lot of compromise on my part as my son is now 18 months old and he still can't come over to mine or stay over BUT...me and my ex get on well, we text once or twice a day about how he is and what new things he's done and my new partner is now allowed to spend some time with him but still not at our house.
I would still love to have more contact but being patient is paying off as it means my relationship with my son's Mum is amicable. My ex was very difficult initially and I will never forgive her for refusing me contact due to her own anger but by being the bigger person I feel we are doing the best we can for our little boy. I know for some Dad's playing the patient game is not the right approach but I just wanted to say that my situation was pretty dire and I was very stressed but with time and overlooking the small things it is working out. Also in terms of new partners...just by being patient and supportive my partner has shown me she is the kind of person I want in my son's life and they get on like a house on fire so don't worry about delaying contact between new partners and children.
Hi LAC
Thanks for your recent post updating us on your situation. They are indeed words of encouragement. I know your situation isn't perfect, not being able to see your son at your house and for him not to be able to stay must be incredibly frustrating. But on the plus side, you are seeing him and I hope that in time things will progress so that you and he can be together in your home.
I wonder how long you are prepared to put up with this situation though and wonder if you have thought about returning to mediation at some point to press for contact at your home. Perhaps this is something you might want to consider in the future?
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