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Hi, just separated from my long term partner and we have 2 kids.. 10 and 13... year old.. She moved out .. as .. well.. she the guilty partner shall we say.. and she told me that she would have to have the kids for 4 days a week if she wanted to claim benefits.... but do I have to agree to this?
Im really close to the kids and am able to provide a stable and secure environment for them.. why should i have to lose kids for 4 days a week.. and not her... any advice appreciated.
Cheers
Hi there and welcome 🙂
If she has left the family home and the children, then providing they want to stay with you, I think you should be the resident parent. After all she is the one that has walked away.
There is a little more that you should be aware of though. If the three of you are staying in the family home, then you need to contact the Benefits office and inform them of the change of circumstances ,so that they can put the Child Benefit in your name, assuming its in your ex partners name at the moment. Whichever parent is in receipt of the Child Benefit payments is considered the Resident parent, or Parent with care.
If you havent married, it might be advisable to find out if you have Parental Responsibility, if things turn nasty and she goes to court for Residency (custody), if you dont have PR it may cause a problem.
It might help to try Mediation, it could provide a good platform to discuss the question of how much contact she has with the children and any other issues thrown up by the seperation. Heres a link ~ www.nfm.org.uk
Good luck with everything
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