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[Solved] She's gone


Posts: 6
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Topic starter
(@chewie)
Active Member
Joined: 15 years ago

Hi all
I'm a divorcee of 5y with a son from that relationship.Met a beautiful woman approx 4.5yago had a wonderful relationship for about nine months,she moved in and fell pregnant,she didn't have the pregnancy she had hoped for and felt i offered little or no support 🙁 . I work fulltime and have provided financially for everything,i admit i could have been more attentive at times. We attened counsilling and have enjoyed a couple of family holidays. She and my mum in particular have never hit it off and our son has been excluded from events where other grandchildren have been invited.She left me august b-holiday weekend and has our son with her.She said she couldnt take it anymore and was un-happy about the way she had been treated. We are communtcating and i have spent two weekends with them since.I've been doing alot of reading and am now understanding the differences between the way men/women communicate,Toxic Parents may have been influencing my actions although i take resposibility for acting the way i did.I love her and my sons and am trying to make things better.
Any other similar experiences or advice pls

6 Replies
6 Replies
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(@Super Mario)
Joined: 16 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1621

Hi Simmo

Sorry to hear about your situation, it sounds like you need to convince her that you love her and that you are prepared to work harder at the relationship.

I would suggest maybe you take her out and be really honest with her and let her be honest with you. It may hurt but LISTEN to her, look for the signs and ask her if the relationship is worth fighting for.

Good luck and let us know how you get on

SM

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(@chewie)
Joined: 15 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 6

thanks sm
I omitted to mention that she is currently 130miles away which is immensley frustrating for me.She has told me she is proud and impressed by my actions recently and the fact we are communicating and spending as much time as a family as is poss must be a positive.(i hope)
I'm reading a book Toxic Parents at the moment its tuff reading but it gives an insite into some of my actions.

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 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11892

I agree with SM - sounds like there is a relationship worth working on. Also sounds like you need to have a serious conversation with your parents - they don't have to approve of your relationships, but if they don't then they should stay quiet, or they could risk alienating you, let alone your family - my parents really didn't like my ex wife, but I never knew about it until I told my mother (my father had died previously) that I was getting divorced.

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(@chewie)
Joined: 15 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 6

I agree the relationship is worth saving.I'm finding the distance the greatest hurdle as it's hard to express myself over the phone or by Text, and its a fine line appering sincere or being needy!
If there is any advice on coping with day to-day life and repairing a long distant relationship i would welcome them.

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 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11892

No advice from me at all I'm afraid on long-distance relationships 😐

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(@Super Mario)
Joined: 16 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1621

I think that if the relationship is worth saving then the distance won't matter. It will be tough but look at it as short term and think of the reward in the long term.

Good Luck

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