[Solved] Father to be

First of all welcome and congratulations on the pending birth.

I'm going to be in the same situation come February. My partner has two from a previous relationship, so I know why you're getting the feelings you are.

However it's quite easy to treat them equally. Just make sure you still got time for the eldest, try not to stop doing things you would usually do together, whatever that may well be, as she'll no doubt feel left out as it is with a newborn about. It doesn't really matter if they things are something small like going to the shops together, or something bigger, it's about that time together. You'll possibly find you'll get more time with her than the newborn if your partner is planning on breastfeeding.

I know it's hard with the step children, especially if they hit funny periods, but just try to keep her involved with everything. We've got a rule that when our baby is born, if the visitors are bringing presents for the baby, they've been asked to bring something small for the other two, so they don't feel as pushed out.

Hi there

Welcome to Dadtalk

It will be hard as you are bound to treat the two differently - however if you are aware of this at least you can make an effort with the older one.

It will always be a different relationship because of the age differences and the eldest one will be entering into those wonderful teenage years so nothing you do will be good enough!

One top tip is to try to spend some quality time with the eldest one doing something together, like a sport or going to cinema, or helping with hoomework. Also make a point of telling them that you are there for them and care!!!

Good luck with the baby and keep us posted

Hi Hutchy,

Welcome to the site and congrats mate on your imminent arrival (how imminent ?).

By the very fact that you are worried about treating them differently - I think you'll find you won't.

Supes suggestions are great - personally I would add that including your step daughter in all aspects of caring for her younger sibling will make her feel included and a valued member of the family unit.

Any idea of the [censored] of the baby ?

Looking forward to your posts mate.

Gooner.

Hi Guys,

Thanks for the warm welcome, and thanks for the comments, I'm so glad I found this site, there is so much information and advice for fathers to be, I don't feel half so crazy now after reading a lot of the posts.

Myself and OH have discussed and we're going to get Step Daughter involved in as much as possible with new arrival, wonder if she'll go as far as doing nappys?? 😆

Yesterday was official due date 😯 but that has come and gone with no signs of the arrival of our Daughter, it seems like it'll never happen, I just want to see her and hold her!
It feels like a million years ago my OH told me she was pregnant and it is getting harder and harder each morning to go to work just in case, but thats the lot for Fathers I suppose!

I will keep you all posted on any news as and when it happens.
Cheers all

Welcome to dadtalk H,

Rug rats never turn up when expected.......

big grats mate. letus know when she finally arrives.

be great if the older one would change nappies for you - that is one job I would have happily passed on.

Maybe you could pay her to do it - what would be an acceptable rate ?

Still waiting on Baby, it feels like its gonna be forever until she comes!
Midwife today though, so she might have some more suggestions to get little-un coming quicker!

this last three days must have been agony mate......nothing worse than getting geared up for something and then having to wait.........

erm...yeah! I've been waiting 10 days now. Sooooo fed up of waiting!

Rug rats never turn up when expected.......

All 3 of mine were by caesarian - turned up when they were told to 😆

Best of luck Hutchy & Basdad - could be a busy weekend. 😀

Still waiting on Baby, it feels like its gonna be forever until she comes!
Midwife today though, so she might have some more suggestions to get little-un coming quicker!

mate, let me list them for you:

Raspberry Leaf Tea (capsules and liquid varieties)
Long Walks
have a Vindaloo
Smelling/Massaging in an oil called Clary Sage (not sure what Julian Clary has to do with it, but hey! 😀 )
Eating Pineapple
Drinking castor oil 😯
[censored], [censored] and more [censored].

But trust me, NONE of these work! I guess if they did, everyone would do it and have their baby on time! Have you got a date when your OH will be induced?

Hutchy? Basdad? Surely there must be some news by now? 🙂

yep, there definately is

My little man was born on 20th November!! 😀 if someone can tell me how, I can post a picture

ok, hope this works

ok, hope this works

He is cute!

thanks. Everyone says he looks like me so gives you some idea what I look like!

Lol. How are you settling into the new routine of lack of sleep etc?

really well, he only wakes once in the night, around 5am so he does good. he's quite placid so I guess that helps 🙂

btw..how do i send private messages now?

I think that admins are still working on the messaging, not there yet.