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Arrested for alleged CCB… meh & help pls!

Alwaysandforever · 2025-02-27T23:54:46Z

Hi all, New here & first post… I’ve been lurking for a while and plucked up the courage to get it out… anyway… End of Jan I received a call from child services informing me a case has been opened against me, and wife + kids are now staying elsewhere as concerns over welfare. Naturally the call took me by complete surprise having walked them to school happily that morning… Spoke to wife who was a bit vague and sounded equally surprised so I thought nothing of it! Briefly spoke to the kids before bed, left it at that… I had expected a good nights sleep and a convo the next day would shed some light on matters… yeah right! Roll on bedtime (or so I thought) and I’m now unexpectedly arrested for alleged controlling and coercive behaviour towards wife. Taken to custody, night in cell, interviewed next day… First big mistake having NEVER been involved with police before, was to interview without solicitor… I felt I had nothing to hide and wanted to disprove whatever the hell had been said (In hindsight I know this was stupid of me, but what’s done is done)… every question possible is asked; finances, socialising, intimacy. I was exhausted! An hour after interview, I’m released on bail (I’m told by interviewing chap, that wife didn’t know I was arrested and didn’t want that…). Bail return set for end of April. I should say at this point I (still) have no idea whether the wife has signed/submitted a statement for the CCB, or attended for a follow up interview (likely I guess?), but as such I’m currently in limbo until I find out what happens next… I get the feeling this has been brewing for a while but can’t be sure… Since then a child protection plan has also been established, tied to ‘emotional abuse’ (review meeting date is set 3 days after bail). So, the initial plan call is shocking, nothing explained very well, the chair was crap, case worker changes tune several times (surprise surprise), leave feeling like I’m at rock bottom, but must press on… Having since had the core group call, it’s now clear there are some actions on me, such as attend a perpetrator DV course, substance misuse course, anger course… genuinely overwhelmed at this point and struggling to comprehend it all. Im still in the dark as to exactly what the exhaustive details are of the accusations. I only know what was discussed at the interview. So I have a couple of questions for your good selves… 1. I haven’t formally instructed a solicitor yet, those solicitors that I have briefly spoken to (a few diff companies via free 30 min consultation), have said essentially nothing can be done right now until I return for bail, so no point in immediate instruction - would you agree? Am I right in saying her accusations are private law and the protection plan is public? Or is this typically dealt with ‘as one’? 2. Regarding the protection plan - am I putting myself at risk cooperating with the DV course etc to speed up the chance of contact with the kids / resolution, even though I’m not accepting I’m guilty for something I do not believe or even fully aware of? Feels like they’re pushing for me to fold/cave, but I hope I’m wrong and this is just a natural step in the process… 3. while all of this is going on, I’ve only managed one single Teams call with the kids in 5 weeks (via family worker). The wife is making it very difficult, claiming it’s too emotional for them, they need counselling first, and is even preventing me from handing over some birthday presents for the youngest as she thinks it’s inappropriate. Should I be doing anything other than cooperate at the moment? Or am I being too polite with the resistance put towards me? I should add that nothing at this stage has involved a court… I’d prefer to keep it that way!! Apologise for the lengthy post… if anyone has any advice that would be fab - anything missing just ask and I’ll attempt to plug the gaps! Ta!

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Alwaysandforever

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Mar 04, 2025 5:25 pm

(@alwaysandforever)

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Joined: 6 months ago

Thank you DadMod3 - I will take a look now!

Regarding the DVPP - I have received further advice that due to the ongoing investigation it should be ok to mention that it is not (yet) appropriate to enroll on the course due to the relevance of the investigation. I'll have to feed this perspective back to the social worker at our next meeting and go from there...

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