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Hi. can any one help.
My babies mother refuses to allow my name on the birth certificate and will not allow me regular access to see my 4 month old child.
Up in till recently me and the mother have at times when the mom has allowed me time with both her and our child but this breaks down on a frequent basis and she breaks all contact and refuses me access
she will not plan any meetings but has offered me last minute visits often when i'm at work or she will cancel at the last minute.
the mom refuses to give me any updates on my daughters well being or progress.
I have financially supported the child since birth and i bought all the necessary baby items before birth.
I start CSA payments end of october 2013.
Im finding it difficult to find out what to do to get my name on the birht certificate and get access to my daughter due to the constant refusal by the mother
Hi Buddy,
Congrats on the little one. I had the almost same problem with ref to the birth cert. I did a slightly sneaky thing (legal) and this worked for me.
I got in touch with one of those solicitors that offers 30 mins free consultation. I then found out that if my ex did not put me on the cert, I could go to court and apply to be put on.
I then asked the solicitor to email me a copy of that that conversation. Once I had that email, I removed the costsings for future consultations and forwarded her that email. Within half an hour I had a text telling me that i should be at the register office.
The next day, I had that magic bit of paper. -- If she's already done it, sadly its a trip to court BUT don't loose hope, she has to provide a good reason as to why your not on it (as far as i am aware)
I have access problems too.... Work are great about it but for how long!??
Hope this has helped.
All the best
John
Hi daz
It's so sad when mothers behave like this.... You have a couple of options here, the first is mediation. Legal aid is still available for this service and you can check your eligibility here
www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
You may think that she will refuse to attend but if you attend for the initial appointment the mediator will then contact her on your behalf and invite her to attend. If she agrees you will be able to discuss The possibility of the mother signing a parental responsibility agreement which would enable your name to be included on the birth certificate. Contact can also be discussed and hopefully agreement can be reached.
If she refuses to attend or mediation fails then you have the option of applying to the court for PR (parental responsibility) and contact. Take a look at the stickys at the top of this section you will find information on representing yourself and also about the C100 form which is the form you use to apply for contact with. You would also need a form C1 to apply for PR. this would cost £200 but in certain circumstances you may be entitled to an exemption from court costs, to find out more you would need form EX160a.
The court will expect that mediation has been attempted, if it hasn't worked for whatever reason the mediator will issue you with a form FM1 which shows the court you have tried this first. That's why it's important to attend regardless of whether she will attend or not.
Here's a link to the mediation service
www.nfm.org.uk
I was in a similar situation, and I played a bit sneaky too.
I take it you don't have parental responsibility? But there is no argument that your the father.
If you don't have parental responsibility ,or you are not on the BC then you don't have to pay CSA as they are not legally your child .(If CSA follow up they will ask for a DNA, and when that comes back positive, there should be no argument).
CSA may ask for back payments so be prepared for that.
You cant apply for access your child until your name is on the BC or you have parent responsibility.
You then have two choices, you can either ask the mother to allow you on the BC
https://www.gov.uk/adding-fathers-name-birth-certificate
Or you have to apply for a Declaration of Parentage which will have to be done through the courts.
Again, https://www.gov.uk/adding-fathers-name-birth-certificate
Either way don't give up, your child will thank you for it in the future.
Start at the beginning and work your way up.
...I think he's already agreed to pay CSA and anyway it's not strictly true that you don't have to pay CSA if you have no PR or are not on the BC...I think you'll find they can,take it! They take the money even if DNA is being done, saying they will repay if the result is negative.
Again, I have to correct Jim, you can apply for PR at the same time as applying for contact, your name doesn't have to be on the BC to get access.
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