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Hi,
My ex split with me last year...I didn't move out until I found out she'd been cheating on me (irrelevant under Scottish law other than grounds for divorce)... Problem is I moved out of the family home, as we have 5 kids, for a number of reasons...obviously the atmospherewouldn't be good for the kids and (as she only works part-time) the benefit system would put us in the least poor financial position...this was with a view to sorting out a separation agreement ("minute of agreement" in Scotland)...however, the x2b wants to stay in the family home until the youngest is 18....
I couldn't afford the rented flat, child maintenance and half the mortgage...now officially homeless (as per local authority rules) and back living with my Mum (and friends)...tried making various suggestions around how we could both practically move on (and get our own places) but all are rejected...last suggestion is to release my share of the home equity by increasing mortgage and term....if this fails I'll have no option but to go down the legal route...worst case (I've been told) is that she could be granted the right to occupy our marital home until our youngest is 18 (12 years of me being homeless and paying over a grand a month in maintenance and mortgage)....
That's my position (in a nutshell)...just wondering is anyone has any experience of how Scottish sheriffs would view such a case...I mean under Scottish family law...a parent has the responsibility to put a roof over their kids heads...however, why would that have to be at the detriment of the father, why would it have to be the family home and why would I have a responsibility to the mother (whether it was her mid-life crisis decision to separate or not)....
For someone whose been trying to do everything right and honour my responsibilities....Any advice would be greatly appreciated...
Thanks 🙂
Hi,
My ex split with me last year...I didn't move out until I found out she'd been cheating on me (irrelevant under Scottish law other than grounds for divorce)... Problem is I moved out of the family home, as we have 5 kids, for a number of reasons...obviously the atmospherewouldn't be good for the kids and (as she only works part-time) the benefit system would put us in the least poor financial position...this was with a view to sorting out a separation agreement ("minute of agreement" in Scotland)...however, the x2b wants to stay in the family home until the youngest is 18....
I couldn't afford the rented flat, child maintenance and half the mortgage...now officially homeless (as per local authority rules) and back living with my Mum (and friends)...tried making various suggestions around how we could both practically move on (and get our own places) but all are rejected...last suggestion is to release my share of the home equity by increasing mortgage and term....if this fails I'll have no option but to go down the legal route...worst case (I've been told) is that she could be granted the right to occupy our marital home until our youngest is 18 (12 years of me being homeless and paying over a grand a month in maintenance and mortgage)....
That's my position (in a nutshell)...just wondering is anyone has any experience of how Scottish sheriffs would view such a case...I mean under Scottish family law...a parent has the responsibility to put a roof over their kids heads...however, why would that have to be at the detriment of the father, why would it have to be the family home and why would I have a responsibility to the mother (whether it was her mid-life crisis decision to separate or not)....
For someone whose been trying to do everything right and honour my responsibilities....Any advice would be greatly appreciated...
Thanks 🙂
I don't know a lot about the financial side of things and I believe Scottish Law is different. You could try contacting the Scottish Childrens Legal Centre for advice - sclc.org.uk Or alternatively the CAB. You could also talk to your mortgage provider about your situation. Some solicitors offer a free 30 min consultation, this might be a way to get the advice you need.
Good luck 🙂
Hi Nannyjane,
Thanks...
I've had advice and consultations with a number of solicitors (all seemed to have a slightly different view on points of law and potential outcomes)...
I suppose that I'm trying to find someone who has had a similar experience or someone with Scottish family knowledge or experience...
Despite the manner of our split, I still want to seek an amicable solution (mostly for the sake of our kids). However, this is quite difficult with an uncompromising ex-partner who is in the unique position of benefits, salary and my contributions that add up to the equivalent of winning the £40000 a year "rich for life" scratchcard...she does not share my urgency of having my own place to be with my children and start to build myself a new life...
Hope there's someone out there who can give me a sense of direction should I end up having to go to court over this...
Thanks again....
Heres a couple of links you may find useful skottiedog -
www.wikivorce.com/divorce/Frequently-Asked-Questions/Getting-a-Divorce/Introduction-to-Scottish-Divorce-Law-and-Procedure-and-for-Dissolution-of-Civil-partnerships.html
www.familylawassociation.org
Best of luck 🙂
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