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hi everyone, i know im asking a lot of questions lately but this ones got me a little worried
on saturday i recieved a application for a discharge of residence order from my ex. one of her reasons were that social services should had put care proceedings in place including putting daughter into care instead of having my daughter live with me, which all i thought was her and her solicitor were just throwing their weight about, well today i spoke to my daughter old social worker who is still my ex's sons social work and she told me she had recieved a nasty letter from my ex's solicitor arguing the same point.
i was under the impression that care proceeding if needed were put in place if there was no one else who can take care of the child.
there was no question that my daughter could have stayed with her mother and brother because of her safety and in my eyes the only option was for her to come and live with me. but is this something that ex has to use that means my daughter could back
thank you all again
martin
Hi there Martin,
This must be distressing for you, and worrying, but I cant help but feel that this posturing from your ex wont be taken seriously in court. Even if there have been procedural errors, the facts remain the same. The issues surround the safety of your daughter, and the fact is she was at serious risk if left with her mother. No matter what smokescreen your ex throws up, the core reasons for her removal remain as strong as ever.
I think that some solicitors will push proceedings on behalf of their clients, even when there is no chance of success, I believe there are monetary reasons for this. My son has custody of his son, recently the mother has been caught with a cannabis farm in her house and is being investigated for using physical violence against her other child, her new partner has also just been released from prison, he was convicted of domestic violence! Because of these very serious issues my son has stopped all unsupervised contact and will no longer allow overnight stays. The mothers solicitor is threatening enforcement of the contact order, knowing full well that the court will take one look at my sons reasons for breaching the contact order and agree with him entirely!
Like you, I think that placing a child with a family member is always the next option, putting a chiId into care being the last resort. I wish I could give you definitive advice on this but I feel as long as you keep on doing what you're doing and reiterate all the reasons why your daughter was placed with you in the first place, and why that should continue I cant see any reason why anything should change.
No question is too many, we are here to help unconditionally, even if we dont have all the answers! 🙂
thank you that really is a great help 🙂
i also found out last night that in the children act it states that care proceeding will only go ahead if there in no other suitable parent to take care of the child. what i dont understand surely a chidrens soicitor would know this so what try and argue it in court?
the help is great i really dont know where i would be with this forum 🙂
Hi Martin,
I am from family Rights Group. We are an independent charity that advises familys about children services (social services).
Sorry for the delay in responding to your post.
I can see that your ex has applied to discharge the residence order that you have for your daughter. Her solicitor suggested that the local authority should have issued care proceedings instead of placing your daughter with you. This is worrying for you.
Although your exe may think this-she cannot force the local authority to take proceedings and nor can the court. If your daughter does not have a social worker-then it is very unlikely that there are any reasons for care proceedings to be taken-so do not worry. However, if you are worried-speak to your daughter exe social worker about your concerns.
For the local authority to take care proceedings ( to seek parental responsibility for your daughter so that they can remove her from your care) they would need “reasonable cause to believe that your daughter is suffering or is likely to suffer significant harm, either because of the care you are giving her is not adequate or your child is out of your control.” So for them to remove your daughter she would have to be at risk of serious harm. There appears to be no reason for this. For more information about the law have a look at our advice sheet about care proceedings.
care proceedings
If you have any questions please post back or you couyld post on our parents board or call our advice line on 0808 801 0366. it is open between 9:30 and 3|:30 Monday to Friday.
Best wishes,
Family Rights Group.
thank you so much for the reply, and perfect timing we are in court tomorrow adressing the application of discharge.
im not wether you can answer this but this evening my ex called as she does every thursday to talk to our daughter, and as always the convosation was short and sweet, my daughter doesnt like to stay on the phone long. but tonight my ex text me saying that she hadnt finished talking so can i get our daughter to call back. i asked her if she wanted to speak to her mum again and she insisted that she didnt want to. so i told my ex this and now she is saying i am stopping her talking to our daughter. i dont want to make my daughter do anything she doesnt want to as she starts to panic. my daughter is 3, am i wrong for not phoning back, in my eyes im not but will the jugde think im being arkward?
one more thing 🙂 in court tomorrow does anyone know how the hearing will go, its only for 20 minutes so i cant see much happening in that time i just wanted a rough idea of what will happen so i can sort of prepare myself for it
thank you again for the help and advice
martin
Hi Martin,
I wouldn't worry about the phone call situation as she did talk to her, and if it is referred to then you can just say your daughter wouldnt go back to the phone a second time as shes only three!
Dont worry too much about what will happen tomorrow, its only a 20 minute hearing and it will fly by...Hopefully someone who has attended recently will come along and give you some pointers! Although I was with my son for his Residency case, I wasn't allowed into the courtroom and had to wait in the waiting room.
Martin, I sent you a private message in response to yours, but I notice you havent opened it yet.... Theres a link to your private messages on the top right hand side of the page....
Best of luck tomorrow and dont forget to come and let us know how you got on! 🙂
well we survived the hearing........
nothing really come of it though, nearly two hours of us arguing it out and all we achived was the phone contact has changed days, mt exs mum can now see our daughter and we have to have contact once before the next hearing.
the things that have now got me scared are my exs solicitor is saying that apparently that things havent been done properly, they are still insisiting that care proceedings need to be put in place, apparently my ex is working with other groups and they are going against what social services are saying and seh is even saying that the cafcass report cant be used because they only used what social services have said and not spoken to any of these groups, im starting to feel i could loose my daughter and some technicality because they say things havent been done correctly.
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