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Hello my name is wellington and i have a 18month old son from my ex partner.So far ive had to take my ex to court,to put a contact order in place after,she took my son to america for 3weeks,without my consent,a day before i was about to see him,on a arranged meeting day.
Since the order was put in place, ive been seeing my son saturdays 12 til 6pm and mondays 12mid day till tuesday at 4pm, on the sleep over day monday til tuesday. I,ve been finding it hard to know what to feed my son as everything i try him on he doesnt eat,and just pushes it away,so he,s just been having milk,scrabbled eggs,and spag bowl.
My worries are my son not getting a balance diet,so ive tried to bring my conserns up with my ex partner,and she doesnt want to talk about this in a civlized manner,starts shouting,and saying my mum said this my mum said that.
After asking my ex for the numbers to the health visitor and the nursery he attends,i received a letter from her solicicitor saying,that my ex is concerned that im unable to cope with my son,and she believes contact should cease for the time being,and wants me to go on a parenting course,so that i can learn how to parent my son.
it says at the end of the letter,im entitled to legal advice,we suggest you seek advice regarding this letter. CAN YOU GIVE ME ANY ADVICE AS ITS COST ME £1600.00 SO FAR TO GET TO THIS STAGE,AND THE MONEYS RUN OUT,AND MY SOLICITOR WANTS CASH UP FRONT.
Hi wellington,
First off, i'm glad to see that you have got a contact order and that, so far this is being adhered to.
First off as long as you are cooking healthy meals i don't see what the problem is. Can i just ask a questions as the answer may not be in your cooking but what your ex feeds him. For example if your son just lives off chips and things like that then healthy options will usually be turned down. Do you know what sort of meals he has with his Mum?
I'm no psychologist but if your ex is instantly brandishing this card she seems like a "control freak". It isn't a case of your not being able to cope but rather it should actually be part of any court order (although it is unwritten) for your ex to support this contact.
I would draft a simple letter back to her Solicitors. Keep it calm, simple and structured.
For example:
Dear Sir
RE: Your Client: [Your Ex Wife] converning [Your Child]
I write in response to your letter with the following in place:
- A Contact Order was granted by [Name of the Court] on [Date this was granted] which highlights that Contact is to take place on Saturday 12pm-6pm and Mondays 12pm-Tuesday at 4pm.
Since this order it has come to my attention that my son refuses meals that i offer. I have raised this with your client who became obstructive. As you will be aware the purpose of a Contact Order is to guarantee our son with time to both parents. This contact order is there to be supported by your client. This is a basic expectation of the courts.
I see no reason for it to be suggested that your client wish to refer me to a Parenting Information Programme. What i would feel more suitable is if your client would disclose to me food items/meals that [Son's Name] likes as foods i have offered so far are being refused.
Contact should be maintained. Any refusal or ceasing of contact will result in the matter being referred back to court as a breach of the present order [attached].
Yours Faithfully
Remember to attach a copy of the Court Order highlighting the relevant parts of the Order.
Good luck and please keep us posted or ask any further questions as needed.
Dear Wellington,
If you have a solicitor, we are unable to offer you any advice due to the Professional Conduct Rules. If you are unhappy with your solicitor you can follow their in house complaints procedure, or alternatively contact the Law Society.
You may be able to find more information on our website where you can download factsheets which may provide them with the information required.
If you are not instructing a solicitor, please feel free to contact us on 0808 802 0008, where you can speak with one of our advisors.
Kind Regards
CORAM CHILDREN’S LEGAL CENTRE
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