[Solved] Court - advice regarding behaviour and comments

Hi, the first hearing is very short, it’s a direction hearing which basically means how to move to the next stage. What was said in the caffcass report?
My son’s first hearing was all of 8 minutes and what they agreed on was mediation and another court date set. we were hoping to get restrictions lifted(not allowed out of area ) she cleverly offered the use of her house as winter was approaching but still only two people allowed, she would go out . It wasn’t ideal but there was no time to argue. I’m presuming you are not seeing your son, are you asking for intermediate contact.
we put a lot of hope in the first hearing, but was so deflated after. It was very sressful but we created our own stress by expecting to much . How case is now concluded and thanks to mediation contact and over night stays have been sorted

Thanks for the reply. I don't have a cafcass report! Am i missing something??

Tel

I have contact at present which has been cut down to just 1 day a week, and even then my ex will dictate times my son is dropped off,etc. I hadn't looked at the possibility of interim contact to increase this in the meantime. My main concern is that in order to support my application can i make comments and statements to the court which although very negative are nonetheless honest and accurate.

Thanks,
Tel

hi , the first hearing is very short and sweet and I doubt you will have time to make comments, but be very prepared to be able to respond to any [censored] she may bring up. Caffcass normally phone you a few days or even the day before or they have been known to see you just before you go into the court room. Sometimes it’s just you and solicitors a caffcass reporter and a legal worker in the court room for the first hearing. Caffcass will ask if you have any welfare issues regarding your child living with the mother , obviously if you have , like drugs , drink not being fed then you need to raise these, any arguments you have between you both are not there concern they are only interested in the child. Also maintenance is a separate issue. As you have your child one day a week she will look pretty stupid saying she has concerns. All cases are different, now as you are getting your child one day a week albeit on her terms(don’t worry this will be sorted) they may well just set another date usually 12 weeks from then to do reports or ask you to go to mediation which will cost depending on your circumstances, you can still get legal aid for this service . Have you got a solicitor? Have you got pr . A lot of Mums cut it down to one day a week and no overnights due to getting more money of csa

Thanks ak57. I do have PR. Am acting for myself in court and know that she is doing similar. Not sure how to prepare for, as you succinctly and accurately put it,...'any [censored] she may bring up'. I am unaware as to her reasons for contesting the application as all I am asking for is a return to the informal contact agreement we had for several years! How do you prepare for the actions or comments of someone both devious and unpredictable?

Tel.

If the mother is behaving unreasonably of course you can say that, as long as your not abusive about it or put it in a nasty way. You can get your point across just by giving the facts in a calm and reasonable way and allowing the judge to draw their own conclusions.

The important issue here is that you have had regular long term contact that was reduced for no good reason. There are no safeguarding risks and you have a close relationship with your son.

It's better not to worry about what she may say, just focus on your position. Put a list together in bullet point form of what you hope to achieve and any important points you want to make. Have a timetable of contact ready to discuss, and don't leave it to others to bring up interim contact, make sure they know you are asking for it to be put in place as soon as you can after you get there.

You can't second guess what she will say or the reaction of the court, just be yourself, be honest and stay calm...when referring to your son try and remember to say our son not my son, a small but important point and one they seem to look out for. Try and come across from the point of view of your son and what is best for him, the court aren't really interested on the impact it is having on you personally, but you can talk about the impact it has on your sons well being.

As ak says the hearing can last minutes, or as in my sons case, all morning....if your case is straightforward then the likelihood is that it will be over quite quickly. Do speak up for yourself, but be respectful. Don't interrupt when others are speaking, take notes and record any dates when statements need to be filed by.

Best of luck!

In hindsight I would have self-repped, but do not regret being represented by a barrister.

I think if I were you - basically stick to the facts.....You want more contact and to be an important part of your sons life. The present schedule is controlling and not in the best interest of the child.

Any allegation that she makes (1) cannot probably be substantiated (2) Even if she makes them, by letting you have contact with your child for at least 1 day - you cannot be perceived as a risk to the child.

At 5 years old he does not have any physical needs (unlike a newborn) to be with his mum 24/7.

CAFCASS should have done an assessment, but it isnt the end of the world if they have or havent. What you need to do is ask the judge/magistrate or legal clerk if you can have more time with your child. If she refuses it doesnt reflect well. Make sure you ask the question!

Good luck!