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Hi everyone!
I'm a first post newbie, and so far, have found the postings on here over the last year such a good read with great advice.
Couldn't see a situation quite like mine, so wondered what you folks thought of this??
My wife decided, last Thursday to collect our 2y/o from my parents, who childmind for us all day, and disappear off to a unknown location after taking a car load of strategic items, including our joint 'paperwork' box which contains everything of use. After arriving home to a surprisingly quiet house, got told that she'd gone away to clear her head, and calls to her parents revealed nothing as to her whereabouts.
Took a call from her Friday, which asked me to vacate house and to inform me of impending divorce proceedings. Gutted doesn't begin to describe it.
Went to see solicitor Monday and Wednesday to seek advice, and i'm being denied any contact with my child, and came home one day to find house has been emptied of many big contents, entire childs bedroom, toys, electricals, garden furniture, all sorts. Have heard from her since that all joint account utilities have been changed to my name only and she's paying her half of mortgage only. She's apparantly looking for permanent home for her and our child.
I've a initial mediation meeting monday so will see how that goes.
A complete and utter shocker to find. No prior warnings of such action whatsoever.
Anyone have any advice on what to ask for or proceed with or to do?
Thanks in advance
This does sound like it's been carefully planned in advance. To be honest, I wouldn't want to give advice at this point as I think in such a situation, your solicitor really is best placed to advise. Apart from contact though, the one thing that rings alarm bells is that box of papers.
Like actd, I'm unsure how to advise you....and as actd says there has been a great deal of forward planning by the looks of it.
At least you have Mediation on Monday, this will give you the opportunity to discuss the situation. I think having contact with your child is the most pressing issue, finances are important yes, but at least she has agreed to pay half the mortgage, and I'm sure the solicitor will be advising you on how to go forward. Perhaps at Mediation you should try and set up arrangements for contact. If not at the home you both shared then at your parents, I would think they are worried and feel guilty that she took your child from their house....what a terrible situation for you all.
If mediation fails then I would assume that it can be sorted out during the divorce proceedings, otherwise it would be a matter of applying for a contact order through the family court. Your best bet is to try and get this sorted with Mediation though as the sooner you can see your child the better for you both, your child will be missing you, and will be very confused and anxious because of all the sudden changes happening in their life.
Hi There,
When it comes to seeing your child you will have no choice but to go to Mediation as that's what the law now requires. Your partner has just broken The Children's Act 1989 by taking your child out of jurisdiction without your knowledge.
As this has all happened so suddenly I would alert CRAPCASS to the fact your are particularly worried about the state of Mothers mind and therefore concerned about the child. This all might sound "dramatic" however if "this goes the distance" you will have demonstrated to all that you have done everything within the law, and taken the initiative, but more importantly, you can say to yourself that you did everything in you power to see your child.
Save your money on solicitors when it comes to seeing your son, but do take their initial free consultation, please read the Guide To Representing Yourself at Court on this website, worth 100 times it's weight in gold.
When it comes to the D.I.V.O.R.C.E you might need the solicitor for that one.
Keep Strong, you can do it.
Laters,
Brian
CAFCASS can only get involved when the case is in court....it would be Social Services or Children's Services as its now known. But Bri makes a good point about her mental state and the well being of your child . If you decide to do this don't be surprised if you don't get much of a response from them, but ask them to make sure they have logged and filed your concerns....this could put further strain on your relationship with the mother, so perhaps you can ask that they hold off on any visit to the mother for the time being.
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