[Solved] Drug Testing & Anger Management

I am in the same boat, get hair strand tests done, you need to go to a lab, I used alpha bio lab, just google. But make sure your tested for everythig as I only got tested for coke and she then said I was on smack ! so had to pay out twice for tests !

Got to go back in a few weeks for factfinding cos she said I was violent, absolute rubbish ! Feel for ya mate

Not quite, she has said some more 'stuff' about me in the CAFCASS report to the CAFCASS officer who has since put it in the report,
Mainly that i take amphetamines & steroids (i dont) - My solicitor has said that she was representing someone last week who's ex claimed this & the magistrates just ignored it as there was no history etc of it.
Reference the anger management, she has said (my solicitor), that is one of the other main points she's raising, so to counter-act what she is saying, book yourself into an anger management course, even if you don't want to do it, get involveed & get it done as it shows you're willing to do anything to spend any sort of time with your little boy again.
I'm basically doing anythign i can to see him again if it means doing an anger management course for a couple of months i'll do it!
It is ridiculous though!

I've requested interim contact, so will see what they say to that (first hearing Monday).

Their concerns are that ' i am a regular drug user of sterids & amphetamines' (i've never taken either), she's just convinced i do as i went to the gym, did a fitness course & lost 3 1/2 st! So i'm more than willing to do drug tests galore.
She also hates my current girlfriend (due to something she was convicted of in the past - I've said she won't be involved, even though my current gf is no longer a risk (risk assessments & reports show this). - We've suggested contact to be had at my parents place (where i live & where my son has always stayed), my solicitor thinks she will contest that so last resort is a contact centre, i would obviously prefer the first one but anything is better than nothing.
My ex has claimed DV against me (we had a huge argument one day) i hit the door at her place & broke it, she then alleged i threw her to the floor & assaulted her (the whole time i was shouting - the reason for this was she had bullied the girl i was seeing at the time, turning up at her work & causing problems for her, she was sat laughing at me saying i didn't scare her)! I wasn't trying to scare her i was just venting!
She the proceeded to claim she was scared of me & that i was harrassing her, the whole time it was her who was turning up to my work place, phoning my parents up & berating them & all sorts. - Hence why i have to be seen to be having an anger management course.
She's managed to convince CAFCASS i don't see there as being any issues & that i don't see the potential risks to my son.

It's all an absolute joke, contact has been fine for the last 18months until i met this girl & my ex stopped it.
Yet CAFCASS didn't see fit to put in that she has a history of mental illness, PND etc etc.

My boy loved coming to stay with us, we live in the country, he's spoilt rotten as he's the only grandchild my parents have, he used to ride on tractors with my old man, sit on my mums horses, he had electric ride on cars, slides, swings, trampolines, giant ride on train & tack, every toy you could imagine & his own bedroom, my ex knows all of this but is just using him to get at me as she knows i won't entertain any of her bullying tactics, instead she has made herself to be the victim & that i'm an incredibly bad person, she forgot to mention that she attacked me with a bread knife one night & repeatedly punched me in the face, but as i had not reported it, it was never logged!

Have you told your solicitor of the violence on you by your ex? These too are relevant. As you should also raise her mental health etc.

Do what your Solicitor says re the anger management, its not always easy getting on to those courses and it does show that you are willing for an assessment.

As for the drugs, testing is so expensive, I would not worry about those until the Court orders it because if the Court do not order it, you have gone to that expense for nothing, and you will be unable to submit the evidence without the Court's permission any way.

I never raised the issues of assault against me as it was over 2 years ago & i didn't think anyone would believe me.

I had my first hearing yesterday, if i'm brutally honest, it couldn't have gone any worse than it did.
My ex refused ANY contact, on the grounds that she doesn't feel i can care for my son & the risks i am quite openly happy to subject him too (my partner as well as my 'anger issues').
She also said she wouldn't let me speak to him on the phone as i play mind games with him (i've never done this).
Her barrister said that they wouldn't even entertain ANY form of contact until a risk assessment & initial assessment is put in place.
As ther is an open case for my little one, the local social services will be doing the report & CAFCASS will have no further involvement.
She also played the 'DV victim' act to a t, asking for a separate waiting room & crying when my solicitor spoke about our child.
They also requested an interim order be put in place for residence 'to aid the police if i ever tried to snatch my son from nursery'.
I have never & would never even consider this.
I can't even remember what is going to happen next as i was so upset & dazed as to what was going on, luckily i had a solicitor.
I'm going to phone her in a moment & discuss yesterday with her as i feel a bit lost.
The icing on the cake, was that my ex/her barrister, has said that if the report comes back suggesting i don't have contact with my son, they will be pusing for no contact at all, ever.

To say i'm gutted & upset is a mass understatement.